Nice Guys Finish First
Nice Guys Finish First when the attraction skills are applied properly,
and consequently…
Nice Guys Finish Last when all or many of the attraction skills are not learned.
Click here to jump below to my 20 Nice Guy Laws on How to Stay Out of the Friend’s Zone
Inner Game:(click on the heading above to see all posted listed in that category.) |
Outer Game:(click on the heading above to see all posted listed in that category.) What to Say When Approaching Women |
Body Language Women Respond to Positively:(click on the heading above to see all posted listed in that category.) |
Understanding Women:(click on the heading above to see all posted listed in that category.) How to Tease or Turn On Women – Coming soon |
If the nice guy does not possess the means, the skills, and/or the drive to acquire those attraction pillars he will most likely finish last. When he makes no effort to change his situation or if he applies the wrong effort countless times, he will finish last. If he then attempts to explain the failures with whiny complaints, demanding that it is the woman’s fault, his self prophecies come true. He is destined to be only a good friend to those women in which he feels the most attraction. If he also claims that it is the woman’s ways for his inability to date, marry, or have sexual encounters with those same incredibly smart and beautiful women, his ability to attract them decreases automatically. He may then attempt to down grade himself and by doing so offering little to a relationship or a sexual experience with a selected partner. He will settle with women that he feels is all he can get. He then deals with it in his nice guy ways only turning himself into a shell of a man where his passion of life is slowly drained to a just a small drop of dignity. He effectively turns that once feared hunter human animal into an unfortunate prey to the results of his actions.
Nice guys finish first when the attraction skills are blended seamlessly to create a charming man. A nice guy with high self esteem and strong confidence that understands women. A mature masculine man who knows how to flirt sexually with a woman. He knows how to handle a woman’s tests with poise, humor, and an understanding of what really turns them on. He understands her attraction towards any man, good or bad, is never a conscious decision in which she can arbitrarily decide. He knows what to say when approaching a woman regardless of the situation because he enters all circumstance without fear of rejection. His confident self and magnetic body language drives his outer game to the point where it does not need to be controlled anymore at a conscious level. Nice guys finish first when women begin to notice every detail of his appearance and life are maintained with persistence, regardless of his style, occupation, or social following of the latest trends or fashions.
I was once that nice guy who finished last and now I’m an asshole!
No…I was the man who kept trying the wrong tactics thinking I could change how a woman felt about me through romance, gifts, and blatantly obvious attempts, seen in her eyes at least , to be the better guy. I wanted to appear be a step above her current, or past love interests and relationships but by doing so, actually decreased my masculinity. Lowering my status below her and delegating myself to being only a good friend. I owned the friend’s zone and I was NOT happy to be a part of a membership where my unique self was lost in the vast numbers of frustrated nice guys.
Thankfully I gave myself some well deserved slaps in the face and found the right people to guide my open hand to the sides of my face. So this site is to teach what I’ve learned and in turn, keeping the cycle alive in my learning processes and attractiveness. By doing this I hope you can all learn from my experiences and the experiences of those linked or given credit here. Each pillar mentioned above will be approached from every angle to allow you to easily find the area in which you struggle with the most. Apply the skills properly and you will see results.
Peter White Now.
This site is for nice guys that want to finish first with women. It is not meant to be for the average guy to proclaim himself to be no more mister guy. Here you should be able to find dating advice on attracting women and still be one of the nice guys. If you want to learn how to attract women, how to get a girlfriend, how to meet beautiful women, and how to practice the attraction skills by using online dating, then this site will guide you in the right direction.
I can NOT do the work for you and I can NOT tell you it will be easy for everyone. But I can tell you that understanding women is really not that hard at all. Understanding what a relationship should be all about, is not that hard at all either. Attracting single, beautiful women is within your grasp as a man. How you want to start the process is up to you though.
Single women are everywhere. They are online on social sites. They are waiting online through hundreds of internet dating sites for nice guys to approach. They are in supermarkets, bars, clubs, and coffee shops waiting for the one nice guy that understands them. Theses single women are also nice just like you. Many of them want to be your girlfriend but if, and only if, you learn the skills of how to turn them on. Theses same women want you to learn this material on this site. I speak to women everyday and I have yet to meet an attractive women that does not agree with the advice given on theses pages or posts, or with the men and ladies I suggest to help you.
They understand dating is not about going out and just picking up girls. It’s about more but it’s a simple process that each and every one of us are born with this ability to follow the process.
It’s about:
Meeting a girl any where.
Creating attraction with her.
Building that attraction through flirting and sexual communication.
Creating sexual tension that builds up to a tipping point for both of you.
From this point YOU, as a strong man, must make the choice to decide where you want the relationship to go. And, as a man, that choice is just as valid as anyone else. If you want to meet women and just have great sex, then that is up to you. If you want to create encounters with several women that they can’t resist calling you, then that choice is equally valid. If you just want to double you dating, find a long-lasting relationship,build a strong family, or even if you just want to be a nice guy, that can GET LAID.(dialteg), then that is completely your choice and no one can take that away from you.
But guess what? Women won’t tell you how to do this, (with the exception of Marni and her wing girls, but you will have to pay for her services to bring out the real man inside you).
Why won’t they tell you?
Why should they. As a boy maturing into a complete functional adult man it is your responsibility to learn it yourself. This is more attractive anyways. A man who women are forced to lead by the hand is not attractive. They are not your mothers. They are strong emotional sexual people with minds all their own. And they have their problems too.
If you discover these truths on your own and study them, practice them continually for the rest of your life you will find women are drawn towards your personality. They can’t resist the charm for it is built deep inside them. Just as what you find attractive is hard wired into your mind. What we humans feel is beyond our control but how we act on them is not. For example…
If you find yourself highly attracted to a certain type of woman and you choose to attempt to buy her affection, then that it is your choice give up the respect of a great women.
If you find yourself feeling lonely and you choose to search for a woman online to fill in the emptiness or need you feel, then it is your choice to discover the type of woman who will always act as your mother, and not your lover.
HOWEVER…
If you feel your confidence and esteem is too low for you be seen as irresistible to women, and you choose to build that confidence and gain the esteem of a charming and flirt man, then you deserve to date high quality attractive women.
If you feel your looks are plain or average, and you decide to discover your true personality, a personality knows how to have stimulating conversations with anyone, anywhere, at anytime, then you deserve to discover the world of dating that most men will never find.
Nice guys can finish first and it pays out immeasurable rewards that will last you a lifetime to learn how to be that guy. Breaking down and separating men into the four general categories,
the nice guy that gets laid,
the nice guy that doesn’t,
the jerk that gets laid, and
the jerk that doesn’t.
…it’s time for you to decide which one you want to be…
20 Nice Guy Laws on How to Stay Out of the Friend’s Zone
1. Being nice has little or nothing to do with Attraction.
Yes I said it. Being nice has little or nothing to do with attraction. Imagine you see a woman from across the room that literally gets you hard looking at her. She has all the physical qualities you look for in a woman and you have this uncontrollable instant reaction to her. You don’t even know this woman. She could be so messed up inside. She could even be a crack addict for all you know. She could be the biggest bitch in the world or the nicest woman you have ever met. The point is you felt attraction for someone you haven’t even met.
2. Just because a woman is flirting with you doesn’t mean you’ve found your next girlfriend.
This one still kicks ass. Women love to flirt. It’s fun. Go ahead and keep up the flirting. Turn it up slowly. Tease her and make her laugh with a confident and cocky attitude but don’t sell the event so far in your head that you lose sight of the present. The present is always where you want t o be. It is the point where you will act the coolest. It is the point at which you can experience life for what it is. A series of present events which you can look back at every so often. But you can’t predict the future.
3. Don’t be afraid to make the first move when the situation arrives.
When the moment presents itself, you must make it happen. You must learn to overcome any insecurity about your skills and go for it. Even if you fail with a particular women she will not see you as just a friend material. Then you never know what’s going to happen in the future. Just keep being the person that made that first move, and learn to live with it. She will know you are a sexually aware man and just thought you felt something between the two of you. Granted this is a fine line issue but I’m talking about those moments you share with a woman where it is clear to both of you and her lips await yours.
4. Don’t ever tell a woman why you THINK she will turn you down.
So bad. So very bad. The nice guy does this without even knowing it. Whether he wants to or not. Through his actions and his body language he conveys the message that he’s not good enough for it. Fuck that. If you work on who you are diligently and respectably you DO deserve any woman who is single. Trust me, complete transformation of a person is a rare event and accomplishing this does mean you deserve what you seek.
5. Don’t try and make a woman feel sorry for you, hoping she will give you a pity date.
Thank Steff for this one. Some nice guys will actually try to guilt a woman into going out with him. I’ve done it myself before. It obviously doesn’t work and creates many problems for any woman to have to deal with you after. I remember even telling a woman about how bad I was doing with women. How terribly my life was up to that point with regards to relationships hoping she would feel sorry for me and give me chance.
6. Never try to buy her affection with money or favors.
The classic manipulation move. You don’t need money to get laid. You don’t need to buy your way into bed. You don’t need to offer gifts hoping she will eventually see you as a great provider. A great provider provides strength and stability in a relationship, not money. Money comes and goes. Women see right through this and instantly put you below them in status. Which is very bad for attraction. At least keep yourself on even status. Never below. If you meet a woman demanding you buy her things constantly, break it off immediately. Don’t worry about her. She will find some nice guy that doesn’t understand attraction to pay her bills. There is no negotiating this one.
7. Never feel sorry for yourself because you got turned down.
I’m sure you’re heard this many times. “Don’t worry Johnny. It will be okay. So you got turned down. There’s more fish in the sea.” BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Here’s some real advice. Go ahead and feel like shit. It’s okay. Rejection is not fun when they put themselves out there. Just remember there’s a difference between feeling hurt and feeling sorry for yourself. I’m not going to sit here and tell you there’s plenty of others, I don’t you personally. I can tell you this though, if you learn from the experience and objectify it the lesson will last you forever. If you only learn to feel more sorry for yourself and sulk in your problems for extended periods of time there will be no theirs. Those so called fish will avoid the shit out of man who whines .
8. Never agree with everything a woman says if it goes against your beliefs.
You have your view. It’s yours. Own up to it. Even if it means upsetting a woman. I’d like to clarify though if your views involve hurting people or treating others anything but as well as you would like them to treat you, get some help. It’s the little things that will make the difference. If you’re attracted to women with big tits and a woman decides to harp on you for it. Let her get over it. It’s your choice. Trust me she will respect you more for this. Don’t be a prick about it, you’re a nice guy remember but I know you have your own views of the world and as far as I’m concerned you have every right to hold them.
9. Learn to be funny but don’t over do it.
Being a goofball is not attractive unless you’re already in a long term relationship. Don’t be afraid to bust your own ass and definitely don’t be afraid to bust her ass. If if she calls you a “Meanie But”. Right Rachel? A strong confident funny man is highly attractive. Make the humor your own Just don’t over do it. You must also learn to know when the time is to act serious. Understand the difference. It separates the sexy funny guy from the comedian that no one wants to sleep with.
10.Tease her often.
Nice guys stuck in the friend’s zone do not do this enough. I’m talking about everything from a sly smile with a soft touch on her neck and as you lean in for a kiss, pulling back. I’m also talking about making fun of her sarcastically of something silly she does. Both work well for creating attraction and will keep you far away from the just friends role when mixed with sexual teasing.Think of it this way. Pre foreplay is playing, flirting, having fun. Foreplay is teasing. Avoiding the real sexual parts of her until you build up the moment. Keep building the attraction up higher and higher until….well you’ll notice some women will attack you sooner than later. It depends on who she is inside and how comfortable she is about sex in generally.
11. Learn to play with a woman through flirty conversation.
Flirty conversation is sexual communication a woman understand completely. Most nice guys don’t. they see it as a player move. Oh he’s just trying to get her in pants. But it’s not. It’s fun. Creating fake scenarios about future events in which she fails with you. Creating fictitious relationships through storytelling. Using sexual humor to entice her or embarrass her. If you can make a woman blush, laugh, and say, “stop that” in a few minutes, she will find your charm irresistible. Because that’s what it is. Charm. My girlfriend called it “being suave” when we talked about how we met. I always had a great answer, sometimes sarcastic, intelligent, strong-willed, charismatic, mysterious answer making her wonder who I really y was and how I lived my life. And I did it without lying. I did it with flirty humor with sexual overtones. Even today I met a woman in which she was in such a hurry. I was slightly rude to her but I overlapped a hint of humor. And she couldn’t figure out if I was serious or not. She couldn’t figure out what I wa really all about. Then I was charming and down to earth with her. Again at first sign of her weakness as an attractive woman, I busted her asses and she laughed with me about it. Ten minutes of a pure flirty conversation that she WILL remember and gave feelings associated with it.
12. Never ask, “Do you like me?”
The nice guys becomes a sniveling wussy with just four words.Don’t do it. Ever. If you learn one thing from all of my pages and post learn to replace in your head “You want me?” and say it with a slight smirk. When ever you feel like saying the above phrase replace it with that. Notice how the dynamics of the situation changes after that.
13. Never ask, “Am I your boyfriend?”
Why in the world would you ask this? But some guys actually do. They begin dating their first incredible woman and get nervous or afraid of loosing her. So they ask the dreaded question. This one question alone can destroy all the attraction he had for you in the first place. It’s a needy act that say to a hot woman. You need her and can’t stand on your own two feet without her.
14. If you ever feel that you are already in the friend zone. Learn what you can immediately what you did wrong and move on, quickly.
So you’ve found another woman you’re falling for and she just wants to be friends. Meet someone else. It probably wasn’t meant to be. Learn what you can and objectify the situation to avoid the same mistakes. Maybe if you’re good about understanding women speak you can ask her exactly what you did wrong and then interpret it. Don’t take too many of her words literally. Women rarely speak literally. They say one thing but what emotions she is portraying is more important.
15. Pay extreme detail to your body language. No slouching. Hovering. Take up the space around you and learn how to own that space.
Strong sexual body language is a must. You can’t fake it forever. You can fake it at first and start small and with enough practice and learning it will become more and more natural to you. Remember it’s confident and competent body language which women respond to effectively. They will notice. Take an average looking guy that doesn’t know how to dress, spits when he talks, and is very loud, will find women wondering what the hell makes him tick if he has string confident body language.
16. Never feel like you have to answer any or every question a woman throws at you.
Appealing to a woman’s every whim is terrible for attraction. Live your own life. Granted if you’re rude about answering it can make you look like a jerk but it’s better than answering all questions. Somethings you have to keep for yourself and not allow others to see. This mystery is highly attractive.
17. Stop blaming women for your own failures.
The nice guy that sits around bitching about his problems being the woman’s fault is highly unattractive. First of all the only person on this entire planet that cares fully of your problems, is you. Don’t forget it. I know you’re going to meet some great people and you may have some wonderful friends but the only person that can actually change who you are is yourself. When you blame others for your problems or your luck you slowly sink into friend’s zone deeper and deeper.
18. Don’t jump all over a woman just because you are attracted to her.
Women hate this shit. One of the best things you can do when you meet an attractive women is to step back. Give her space. Allow moments to develop naturally and don’t force the issue. Every other nice guy out there is doing that and she loses all respect for them because of it. You can’t cling, be needy, or constantly be trying to spend time with her. It won’t work. You have to live your own life and allow her as your guest.
19. Learn to be confident not arrogant.
Women love confidence. I can not emphasize that enough. It is the trait that if you don’t have your success with women will only be measured in tiny increments.
20. Invest in yourself
The phrase become “more selfish to be selfless”. You are going to have to give up some things to be that better man. Saying no is one way. Giving up some people in your life that are negatives is a real possibility. As you go through this man transformation process and become the attractive man woman respect and seek out there are going to be some downsides. Everyday just keep yourself on a track that produces results. Every man or woman you read that give great advice or have competitive quality programs took the time to learn this. Many of them have taken the time to invest in themselves. Some had to give more than others but that’s not the point. Live your life everyday and evolve yourself with each opportunity and you will see great results.
Our social surroundings and how we are raised you have had no control of. But you do have control over the destiny in which you want to create for yourself. My destined included over ten years of searching. That’s a long time. When I first allowed others to teach me and practiced what they taught. I gained immeasurable results. All in which were consistently effective. Not the kind of help that goes away tomorrow. It’s the kind of help that always drives my passion to want to learn more and more with each passing day.
Yeah I was a nice guy. Yeah I was stuck in the friend’s zone over and over. And everything I write about I have experienced. Everything I write about stems from I what learned throughout my life. Everything you read are small examples of an experience or an objectified experience through which the people you hear about me plugging, has helped me. My learning curve shot through the roof when I began to find the information I was looking for. Up until that point it was slow. Sure I kept moving along but I honestly do not believe I could have gone this far in this amount of time without any of them affecting me in one way or another.
Whether it was the constant barrage of David’s newsletters. Or hearing Marni’s voice for the first time explaining what a woman find attractive. Whether it was Doctor Paul teaching me about confidence or Sean telling me to get off my butt. Let’s not forget Steve’s help in turning up my flirting to new level, or Carlos’s amazing writing that makes the alpha man within us nice guys, reachable. Then there’s David Wygant’s conversational skills and sexual advice that has allowed me to see deep into a woman’s mind and body. Let’s not forget Joseph Mathews and his” I’m fat and bald and still get laid” attitude. His teachings have broken down the inner workings of attraction to a point where my whole belief system changed. I can’t forget Rob. His exercising routine has changed the way I walk talk and feel. He also has allowed me better sex and a more rounded real swagger to me. I was amazed by how just equalizing my muscles to work together could make me more sexually attractive, but it did.
Again I’ll mention David D. because, to his credit, introduced me to my first real concepts of attraction and how my nice guy ways were landing me on the fiend’s zone. Consistently. He taught me doing something wrong over and over while producing consistently bad results just won’t work. His insight and way of putting it so I could understand fully, definitely made it easy on me. It was through him that I was able to branch out and explore all the aspects of attraction. It was him that introduced me to all the acknowledgments above.
Truthfully now, I have little experience with Vin or Dean. I’ve read some of what they teach and felt it could benefit my readers if that is what they wanted to pursue. Maybe soon I’ll break down and buy some of their material so I can dig deeply into their thoughts on the attraction and dating subjects. Maybe I’ll get lucky and they will send me their stuff for free. HINT HINT. If you’re reading this guys. Ahem Ahem.
I’m so glad we had this opportunity to have this talk about the nice guy laws for staying out of the friend’s zone. I seriously hope it has helped you in any way possible. Take the time to subscribe to my newsletter and maybe we could be so called internet friends. Haha!. You can’t go wrong. I’m not a spammer. I’m one person now and I’m sure the newsletters will be slow coming.
Don’t forget to stop back often as I will from time to time go into more detail on the nice guys laws. I’ll probably even add more if I come with them. Any questions or comments, you know what to do.
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“DialteG, or get laid, or Getting Laid… will be used as a broader term to define men and women experiencing better sex, more frequent sex, and everything pertaining to it not including certain fetishes or demeaning acts to anyone involved. Nor is it meant to be achieved through deception of any kind for it is to be contained only within the scope or framework of the challenging yet rewarding task of self transformation in the mind and of the body.” |
about 3 months ago
Great stuff, man! I like the list. I may even include some of these rules in my upcoming project: The Bad Boy Formula.
I’m also grateful to know I had an influence.
Remember, guys, the nice guy isn’t so nice, and the bad boy isn’t so bad…