DiaLteG – A Nice Guys Approach To Dating, Attraction, and Relationships

DiaLteG – A Nice Guys Approach To Dating, Attraction, and Relationships post image

DiaLteG™ is get laid spelled backwards but it means so much more:

Dating – The opportunity to explore and interact with single people. Dating is about discovering who we’re looking to enhance our lives with many choicese. Dating is meant to be a fun way to qualify and connect with others. You can find all posts to help your dating life here –>Dating.

Inspiration – Driving our energy and stimulating our imagination to step above and beyond our existence. This helps us to take chances and risk life a little more to seek new experiences. Go here –>Inspiration to become inspired.

Attraction – An instinctual but sometimes misunderstood “emotion” which alludes too many men and women because of the complexity of our modern social lives. Learn all about –> Attraction.

Learning – The quest for knowledge and understanding how our personality and how we present it to the world can be a never ending but enjoyable process. This is where I get to show you –>Learning.

Teaching – Boring classrooms and bad lighting is not what teaching is about. Keep the cycle alive and teach what you learn. Give a little back and accept whatever reward, big or small that come your way. When you’re capable of giving women something intangible to remember and think about you, they will want to be around you. This is how it’s done and how I do it –> Teaching

Experience – No one can experience your life for you. When we share those incredible moments with those around us we help them join along in our pleasures. Choose your –>Experience and live it.

Growing – Becoming a more attractive person, enjoying a fun and successful dating life, and entering more fulfilling relationships requires each and every one of us to grow into a mature and complete person. You can do that here–> Growing – Mature masculinity.

The nice guys approach is an attraction “system” for guys who want to attract women without guilt.

The approach is designed so you never have to worry about women finding out what you’re doing because they won’t care. There’s nothing devious or manipulative to try.

The nice guys approach is based on the principle that “being nice has little to do with attraction.” You can still keep your values and beliefs without having to compromise your integrity.

It helps you to realize your potential, tap into your true masculinity, and live a more complete fulfilling life.

Which will very early on and inevitably…. NATURALLY ATTRACT WOMEN.

You see by using the core principals of attraction this “approach” will enhance your personality, help you develop a sold social life to meet more women, allow you the freedom to make better decisions and choices around women, and ultimately allow you control over your dating and relationships. Whatever your goals may be.

The nice guys approach is about taking “woman” out of the equation.

It’s not about trying harder – it’s about doing less for her, getting more for yourself, and eventually not having to try at all…

SCREECH!!!! Stop it right now!

Seriously man – there’s a little devilish guy inside you and I guarantee you’ve been hiding him from women. Probably because you’re one of those “nice” guys.

You’ve been made to believe he’s evil and he’s a womanizer. How he plays women for their bodies. It’s to the point now where you’re actually afraid of him screwing up your “nice” image to the opposite sex.

But I’m here to tell you up front and honestly – hiding him is the absolute worst thing you can do to yourself.

So while you’re trying to “play nice” for her or all women you want, you’re treating yourself unfairly and you’re not being very nice to the guy inside you who maybe just wants to get laid once in while. Who wants to enjoy and explore his options in the dating world. Who wants to maybe experience something more than chasing women with no success or playing it safe waiting for them to choose you – when they won’t.

Through years of trial and a ton of failures under my belt (and in my pants) I’ve come to realize he’s not evil. He’s not a bad person. He’s a part of you and without him included in your life – creating and building on attraction is almost impossible.

Wait now… DiaLteGtm is NOT here to give you permission to treat women like sex objects and objectify their existence.

If you or I wanted to do that we wouldn’t need people like me around.

A word of warning and truth… because I’m a nice guy :)

Every “10” you meet who “does it” for you won’t throw themselves in your bed. They won’t call you up in the middle of the night for a “quick lay.” They won’t beg you to become her husband or boyfriend but that’s okay and you know it.

You won’t become an overnight playboy who only needs to wear robes and smoke a pipe.

You might not even become the “coolest” guy in the world sipping drinks surrounded by beautiful women.

I’m not saying it can’t happen but it probably won’t.

If you’re with me here… cool!

So don’t expect hard promises on my part and I won’t expect you to always get it right because I was an idiot one day failed to communicate my ideas with you.

That is why dialteg is here. You might not be an “old man” like me or we may never agree on everything but we share a common theme to our existence in this planet…

We’ve been too nice for too long and have neglected a part of ourselves which creates an abundance of attraction in every way, shape or form.

That inner self holds the truth and the path to a better understanding, and can help us lead our lives in a new direction.

I won’t ask you to start treating women badly if you promise to treat yourself better. If not – all bets are off. (Evil laugh – “Bwhahahaha”)

…By the way – My name’s Peter White.
My “Nice Guy” Approach for men is about learning to use your nice guy “habits” for yourself and not on women. It’s not about learning how to be someone else it’s about learning how to be yourself without trying. (And still have quality choices with women.)

THE NICE GUY APPROACH narrowed down:

PLUS The amazing and popular: 11 STEPS TO GETTING A GIRLFRIEND:


All steps are listed here: Getting A Girlfriend Steps – Where, When, How and Relationship Ready – Sitemap

18 comments… add one

  • Vincent Corpuz

    I like this very much! Very informative

    • peter white

      Thank you Vincent and welcome to DiaLteG.

  • I'm confused

    Totally confused here, I’m not gonna say my name on here … just need to see where I stand with this guy … we been on again off again for about 3yrs we both only been with each other….here’s the thing I really like him more then just a friend I honestly think he does me too …if it was just a sex thing it would have already been done with .. we keep on coming back ..he worries about his friends and what they think ..but every time we together he says its just between us no body else business and so we have our time when we together he’s totally different with me and we go out on the weekend at this club we go to he’s different cause he’s around his boys ….but stays close where I’m and watches me and my girls … he gets mad when I dance with other guys …but I don’t want no other just him …I see it on his face we play that game where he try to make me jealous when he talks to another girl.. here’s the thing where do I stand …I just don’t know what more to do …I’m going crazy when I’m not with him ..I mean when I see him my heart feels like it’s coming out of my clothes and I act like a little girl all shy and stuff and he does the same thing … can ask any of my girls they would agree but like I said he’s different when he’s around his boys …what to do ? Confused girl what do you think of this….

    • peter white

      Hello there,

      I’ll try not to get too judgmental here because I know your feelings are intense for this guy.

      Instead I’ll put myself in your shoes and imagine if I was secretly seeing a woman (on and off) where publicly (within her social group) she was acting the same way.

      First I’d consider or wonder WHY her friends might have a problem with me or us being together.

      Secondly I’d question WHY this person is so concerned with their friends that is what affecting our “relationship”.

      Third I would begin to come to the conclusion this person is NOT willing to “live by their own rules” and relies so much on what others think, where possibly could it all lead to.

      After that of course I’d wonder why I even bothered getting myself in a situation like this. Understanding how easy it is to kind of fall into it without even realizing it, which I’m sure happens a lot.

      BUT to continue despite the first, second, and third arguments above goes beyond certain moments. At some point we need to CHOOSE a better direction.

      This is my “nice” way of saying – If a person accepts friends who dictate their lives and decisions more than an individual’s better judgement then no matter how deep it feels or hard it is to get past, “what to do” MUST be to move on!

      Despite everything a man says – his ACTIONS are what really counts. He’s only proved to you he cares more about his friends and their opinion than he does about you two being together.

      That is where I believe you stand with this guy.

      So… he tries to make you jealous INSTEAD of making you happy.

      He gets mad when he sees you talking to other guys but REFUSES to BE your man.

      He tells you it’s nobodies business when you’re together BUT refuses to actually stand behind those words publicly in front of his friends.

      Now the real kicker you’re not going to like: You wrote, “If it was just a sex thing it would have already been done with…”

      If it was anything more than just a sex thing – he would have done something about it already. Men don’t choose to have casual sex with women if there’s something more.

      You can read more about that and this quote will help you out:

      You can go from a committed and deep relationship to something “casual” or physical with a man. For a man, that’s relatively easy. But it almost impossible to go from the “friends – with-benefits” situation to a deep, fulfilling, intimate and lasting situation. If you know what I’m talking about here say “Amen!” I know this first hand. From my own love-life and from TONS of men and women I’ve known in my life.

      So here’s the “RULE”:

      DON’T EVER try and start things with a man at a casual and purely physical level if you EVER want the option for something more meaningful or long- term.


      I know – it’s hard to take it all in. That I understand.

      But I do hope you take my opinion, objective, subjective, or whatever… as at least an option to help you better decide what to do next.

      Thanks for sharing and I’m wishing you all the best,


  • Great advice , I will be coming back for more :)

  • Molly

    Love it Pete. Very nice

  • Raymond

    Hi Peter. I need some advice. I’m crazy for an employee of mine. (very small company, not like it’s a big corporate thing – not a big deal to either of us). We’ve been working together for about 3 months. I’m on my way out of a failed marriage and she’s recently divorced and has a boyfriend, but we’re hitting it off pretty good. I screwed up early in the relationship with some saavy poetry, but the content was way way to early for our relationship and I spooked her a bit. She got over it. Then I did it again & she got over it again. Since then, I’ve pulled back a great deal and have been pushing/pulling a bit, which seems to be working pretty good. We had dinner together at a restaurant one night after we met for a reiki session – no kiss, but a hug goodbye after some pretty deep personal discussions. With my history of forwardness with her, I didn’t want to scare her off. She surprised me 2 weeks ago and invited me to dinner at her place – it was a casual invite, ‘hey, I’m cooking some soup, wanna come hang out’. I did. Her body language was there, and she was wearing these nice little shorts. She toasted me with her wine glass before we ate. After we ate we sat talking, her in a chair me on the couch across the table. Lots of smiles and laughing etc. She sat for a bit with a leg stretched out horizontally, from left to right with her thigh pushed up tight, I wanted to gnaw on it like a turkey leg but I made no move, still cautious of spooking her. Again, no kiss but a hug goodbye – ‘I turned my head away, for all I know she could have had her tongue hanging out of her mouth.’ Well I just got back from a trip and I brought her one of her favorites, 10 yr aged white cheddar. She invited me over one night this week to eat the cheese. Set me straight bro. My thoughts are, I’d rather make a move and get shot down than be a chump and do nothing. As far as I can tell, the next step for us is to seal the deal with some hot steamy sex, or at least a kiss. I am experienced with women sexually, but I’ve been out of the game for 13 years (marriage). Is this chick into me and I’m missing my chance with my cautious BS? Please….share your knowledge / advice.

    • Hi Raymond,

      “Gnaw on it like a Turkey leg…” Haha! I’ve never compared a sensual part of a woman to a Turkey before but if it works for you…

      Seriously now.

      My gut feelings says that the attraction for you was there from around the beginning or developed over the few months you worked together. Which is a good thing.

      And as you already knew, sharing what you did with her so early kind of “creeped” her out but also in a way you didn’t mention, probably flattered her.

      Attraction is a funny thing. If she didn’t feel it she would’ve ran for the hills when you started “courting” her but since she didn’t, she must have felt something.

      That’s the good news.

      The bad news is – the mystery is gone. She already knows or assumes she can have you whenever she wants. At least that’s the way I see it based on my experience in these kind of things.

      She’s giving you the opportunity to further your interaction, to see if you’ve gotten over her, to perhaps even test you on your diligence and/or restraint.

      I think what you’re doing is kind of telling her you’re a “relationship” type of guy who is willing to wait it out. Court her for a while. And then maybe she’ll “let” you go further when it fits the moment. She’s ( knowingly or not ) increasing her tests and will continue to do so unless something changes.

      With that said – the “tables” need to be turned. She already knows how you feel but I doubt she’s convinced you’re willing to act on them because like most people, they’re never fully convinced on it until something does happen.

      Personally I would begin to tease her. Frustrate her a little. Turn the heat up on her. Allow her to imagine a new mystery or create something different than what she’s already experienced with you. Her imagination MUST be poked, peeked, and then drawn out.

      The other idea is – remember, just because a woman knows you’re attracted to her is not the end of the game. It’s only the beginning. It’s the guys who try to do what you did to create attraction when it’s not there who end up putting themselves so deep in her friends zone there’s little chance they can get out.

      Think of it this way or the mindset you might act from,

      “Sure you’re hot. Sure I want to gnaw on your leg. But for ME… I need more. I want more than just an overstuffed dinner which will put me to sleep. Prove to me any courting on my part is only my way of getting to know the REAL you and I’ll explore more. Prove to me my courting is simply an Ego boost for you and it’s over. I’ll move on. So I’m going to tease you with my charm. I’m going to sexually excite you because I know how to BUT you’re NOT getting this manly body that easily. I’m a wanted man who may get a little “cheesy” at times but that’s just romance is fun and I love to make a girl smile.”

      I hope you can see the difference and the attitude you might now need to portray. And for better results – date other woman immediately. Explore every option available.

      Yes being cautious will only solidify in her mind that she can have you when she wants which is another reason to tease her and then give her some time to create some new experiences in her head with you. Give her the time to allow her imagination to truly take off. After she thinks about things she’ll be more likely to feel something more and then to ACT on them or better yet – you.

      Best of luck to you Raymond and I do hope this has “set you straight” and yes – I’m with you, Rush is amazing! One of my favorites.


  • Danielle

    Wow Pete. Wow. Lmfaoo This is great.

  • youssef

    i have a question please .. what to do after giving her space and not being needy anymore !? how to manage this state and balancing it without pushing her away !??

    • Hey Youssef,

      First I must say everyone seems to have their own “balance” to maintain based on their past “neediness” and their personal deal.

      There’s no trick to doing it. A great rule to follow, which may or may not seem obvious is… if it’s working, keep doing it.

      Also be realistic about it. If you’re doing things right and under most circumstance she’s still pulling away, then that’s HER deal and not yours. She just might have her own issues causing it so matter no what you do won’t work with one particular woman.

      I know, it’s rather vague advice but maintaining balance is really just about learning where you cross the line, being more aware of the things you did in the past which caused it, finding the root of your personal things, and then just doing your best to catch them BEFORE the get out of hand.

      You might find out your personal “deals” in this post I wrote some time ago. It’s deep but it CAN help you find the cause to help you avoid and maintain some balance and give the appropriate space more naturally.


      Make sure you read the entire series Youssef and thanks for asking, hope it helps you out,


  • alex b

    PETE UR MY IDOL!!!!!!!!!! GET ME LAID! :)

    • Nice Alex… I’ll see what I can do for you BUT only because I’m your idol. Haha!

  • Ava

    Hi Peter,
    Thank you for doing what you do and taking the time to graciously answer everyone who reaches out. A 42 yr old never married man reached out to me on a business networking site. I’m 40 never married either. He asked for my number and he started texting me. We texted for a good 1 1/2 months before it ended almost 3 weeks back. We shared some good conversation getting to know one another and he seemed very sincere with his words/compliments towards me – calling me cutie, sexy, gorgeous, etc. A few weeks into texting he suggested I come by and say HI since we work a few miles from each other. I said of course when I come back from my bus trip I could do that. When I mentioned it again to him he didn’t make any mention of it so I dropped the subject. Right before 4th of July holiday I asked him if we had graduated to a phone call. Honestly at this point I wasn’t sure what was going on. We were both still texting but he wasn’t asking me out and things weren’t progressing. I was kinda getting bored. He responded back with yes he thought we had. I didn’t want to do this but asked for his availability for a phone call. This was almost 3 weeks ago and there has been no response on his end. Obviously, he is conflicted or maybe I missed the boat and there is no interest on his end?!? My question is why would a guy text a girl for almost 2 months and show genuine interest if he really was not interested? Was he just being polite?? I can’t help but to feel completely jipped!!!

    • Hi Ava,

      Hard for me to tell exactly what happened. I can only guess that he’s scared. Not of you but himself and feels more confident texting you. That would explain why he didn’t follow through with his proposals or seems to back down at the last minute. It just sounds like his self-esteem is not too high which trust me, has nothing to do with you.

      Next time I would say stop being so polite. :) Don’t ask. Just call. If he doesn’t answer, then he doesn’t answer. Again that’s his problem of insecurity.

      You did everything right and he still wasn’t progressing. That means he won’t ever progress, doesn’t know how, isn’t as interested as you thought he was ( which is doubtful) or he’s got something strange going on which he doesn’t want you to know about. (Again highly doubtful.)

      He’s the one who should feel “jipped” out, not you. He’s missed a great opportunity because he was all talk and no action.

      He was obviously interested. I think you know that too.

      Thanks for sharing Ava and I do hope this has helped you move forward without him and helped you realize what HE has missed out on,


  • abhishek

    hello peter,
    I am facing similar problems with her and need help so that I don’t make it worse. I am 22years old nd I really want to be with this girl.. first everything went amazing. she said she too feels about me. but from few months I have been in insecurity mode. that negative things. assumptions n all. now she says she have faded intrest and feelings about me. don’t know what to do. just want to save it before it is out of my hands. and before she says she hasn’t have any of feelings for me. and yea she says she wants to stay friends. she said it from the start. pls help :(

    • Hello Abhisek,

      I only see one solution which might work for you…. Work on your insecurities and not “keeping her” before it’s too late. She lost interest because of all that. You probably came off as needy, jealous, and more and she lost the initial attraction.

      So go ahead and work on those things which you told me about, “insecurity mode. that negative things. assumptions n all.” and find a way to build your confidence so it doesn’t happen again.

      I wish I could say there’s some magic trick you can do but I would be lying. Take it one step at a time and keep moving forward. It’s possible. It’s within your grasp. You just have to be willing, find the right help here if you have to (specifically DAvid D’s work on deep inner game and man transformation and I believe she’ll start seeing you like she used to.

      Also, give her space because if you stay too close you’ll quickly revert back to acting the way you did.

      I understand it’s tough but small progress can make all the difference in the world.

      You’re young and I believe, in the end, the work you do for YOURSELF and not for her specifically will not only pay off, but give you a strong sense of identity women will respond to AND down the road, you’ll thank yourself for doing it.

      Best of luck to you and remember it IS possible, don’t let anyone convince you it’s not,


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