Our bodies say a lot when it comes to communicating attraction.
This is a beginner’s “course” but I believe if we can get that handled, it makes increasing the attractive urges of women so much easier.
It’s also important to realize how we present our bodies kind of rubs off on those around us. If we get too caught up in trying to read a woman’s body language we could easily let ours slide which as you might have guessed it, can ruin the attraction.
Below you’ll find a video which makes figuring all this out much easier. It’s not the greatest but it does cover some important aspects such as the negative signals we could be giving out, and how to communicate positive signals.
First, you must understand that everyone exhibits so much body language you must become an expert at it to get it all handled. I say don’t worry about all that. Get the basics covered for now and from there, you can take it as far as you want – as in reading her signals better.
Secondly I’ve found you have two ways to tackle all this expertly:
- You can work on an exercise routine which frees your body up as in Rob Brinded –> Code Of The Natural (an exercise routine I use) or
- Get a higher priced one designed specifically to help you attract lots of women as in the Love Systems –> Beyond Words – Body Language – The Art of Body Language & Seduction or one more much less expensive… Body Talk – The Definitive Guide On Body Language For Men.
Enough talk, right? so let’s get to….
4 Negative Body Language Mistakes To Avoid:
These are mistakes I see everyday and if women didn’t notice these kind of things consciously or subconsciously then my earlier life might have been much different. Haha! I highlighted the time on the video in case you want to stop it exactly.
A lot of these happen to us over time so they’re hard to notice we’re even doing it. But they’re there. If you take a few moments and carefully watch others you’ll see these mistakes and the more attractive cues everywhere. Keep your eyes out for them.
# 1. Hiding Something (0:49)
When we appear to others that we are “hiding something” it’s not to be taken literally. At least most of the time.
This often communicates a fear as in being afraid that others won’t like us so we hide our true selves most of the time without even knowing it.
We can tell ourselves all we want that we don’t care what others think about us, and sometimes it’s true – and sometimes it’s good – but as far as body language goes I believe it’s better to be open, relaxed, and send out the message that we’re not afraid of anything.
By avoiding this mistake we’re also assured our words (while we’re demonstrating natural indifference) are fully supported and will more likely be believed and trusted.
Just because a woman may not believe we are actually hiding something, her inner mind is thinking we are afraid of something. We’re protecting something. We don’t feel competent and confident.
And all that comes from just a close off stance… it’s just not worth it. The goal should always be open, relaxed, and as I’ve been told, “Take up space.”
#2. Threatened or Rejection (1:10)
The video suggests “rejection” and in that moment it might not show instantly although some of us do cower, but I feel over time, after each rejection we take personal, or when bad things happen which are bound to, slowly our body rejects the world and our posture shows it.
Since we can’t always avoid negative things happening to us we must train ourselves to learn from them, accept them, deal with them as positively as we can, and move on.
Just as our posture of looking threatened or rejected follows through with a bad perception of the world – so to will a positive outlook enhance our posture. (Barring certain physical ailments of course.)
Something which has been taught to me (psychologically speaking) is that reasonably mentally stable people can NOT feel attracted and empathy at the same time. If we appear threatened and our bodies always looked rejected or even dejected we’re more likely to have women feel empathetic to us causing me to believe…
This kind of body language actually does the opposite of attraction and avoiding it would definitely be in our best interest.
#3. Hiding Anxiety (2:04)
Take a look at the video and notice the way Bob has decreased the space he has taken up with his body. His hands are stuck together and it appears again, that he is hiding something.
Remember we might not be actually hiding something BUT if we appear like we’re lying about something (as in this body language mistake) women are less likely to trust the sincerity of our words.
Here’s an example:
If we were to tell a woman,
“I really like your eyes.”
But our body was displaying anxiety she would question the compliment and give it no meaning at all. Since I believe compliments should be used sparingly, especially ones she’s heard of million times, it’s best to make sure when we do say them – they mean something more than the last ten guys who might have said it.
She might also assume our intention, even if it’s just to see “if she’s worthy” 🙂 is solely to get in her pants and her guard goes up.
Just another reason why how we communicate with our bodies is so important and how, by removing these signals, we can open up opportunities we missed in the past all because how we were display our body made it difficult for others to trust our sincerity. ( And this happens in all poarts of life and is not limited to attraction.)
Something which has been drilled into my brain which has helped, “It’s not the words. It’s how you say them and how congruent your body backs the up.”
Which brings me to…
#4. More Concealment (3:47)
If you watch the video disregard the crossing of her legs because it’s feminine.
Most men do not cross their legs like this BUT they we can easily tuck our legs in and clench our hands on something when we’re concealing a trait in our personality or trying to conceal something we don’t like about ourselves.
A classic example of this is when we’re afraid a woman might not like us and we’re attracted to her, our bodies try to conceal that from her with little tells. Our subconscious never lies.
We also don’t want to let it our that we’re not feeling confident with her and thus our bodies try to hide it without us even knowing we’re doing it.
Since I’ve been taught confidence is attractive AND if we’re not feeling confident but we don’t want to show it – something’s bound to come out.
Truthfully not all women will notice this consciously, more will actually notice subconsciously, so it’s definitely an advantage to train our selves (obviously first to be more confident,) but in the meantime never let it out through our body language by looking like we’re concealing something.
Was that four mistakes already? Well okay they’re all similar but enough of the mistakes.
So what are…
3 Positive Ways to Communicate Attraction Through Our Bodies:
Women make instant judgement which are no different than what we might find ourselves doing to them.
With the right body language we’re practically guaranteeing those instant thoughts are in our favor and are more on the attractive side of things.
You’ll definitely need to look at the video for these because we need to train our eyes to recognize and then try to mirror them.
#1. Confidence (0:15)
Notice the strong posture a truly confident person has.
I realize we’re looking at a woman here so it must be added to open our legs wide and comfortably and always take as much space as possible without pushing people away forcibly. If we have the room – use it all.
This is a very strong confident position to take and if we look at any guy who has no problems attracting women we see it everywhere!
It opens up women more. It opens up other people more. It almost demands respect and I suppose more importantly think about this…
If women notice ALL attractive guys do this and we’re doing this – she’s to assume we’re more attractive AND that we have experience with women. Strange how that works but if she believes attracting women comes naturally to us, she’s more likely to feel attracted to us.
Opening her open also makes it easier to talk, flirt, and say whatever is on our minds without coming off as some creepy-ass dude either.
No matter how we’re feeling we CAN ingrain a confident posture. Yes we all should be working on our confidence and yes we can use exercises to uphold our posture and with so many way to tackle this problem and look more positive, just a little goes a long way.
#2. Engaging (1:44)
Betty again. I think she likes Bob, what do you think?
But again this is about us and not her so ignore her legs. Unless you want to attract guys who like that it’s best not to show any feminine body language.
The engaging body language is tough and must be done from a confident position. This is because we don’t want to come off needy.
Notice how some guys are all over women when she’s talking and giving her so much of his attention it backfires. So be careful…
The idea is to just let her know (through our bodies) that we’re genuinely interested in what she’s saying BUT we’re also aware of our surrounding AND we’re creating space as in above.
See how it can be tricky?
Too much looks desperate. Too little appears uncaring.
Just enough and you can sit back comfortably and she’ll follow our lead and end up doing the same thing. The idea IS to get her to come close to you and I believe that is why this works great because if we can get her to do the same she’ll actually begin to feel more attracted to us.
Practice it sparingly.
If she responding positively it’s also a good opportunity to break the touch barrier slightly which helps increase sexual tension but also sets us up for more later on.
Think of it as body flirting and it will make more sense.
It made more sense to me when I approached it with this attitude,
“I hear what you are saying. I see you are feeling attracted to me. Also I’m not afraid to touch you casually and now I’m going to lean back and make you wonder if I’m really that much into you.”
Timing is also important and just on the side, if she’s not interesting you at all, don’t do it because it will feel and look staged.
If we get the timing and positioning right, then the touch and sitting back comfortable, it really shows a woman how confident weu are talking to her or any woman for that matter.
#3. Posing (2:47)
Posing shows confidence on many levels.
All attractive men pose regardless of how physically attractive they are.
In the video the hips are mentioned. The groin and pelvis region play a big part of the posing. Just because she’s a woman in the video does NOT mean we should ignore this highly sexual area.
In fact woman check this out very often just most of them don’t even realize they’re doing it.
Our pelvis region is a sign of fertility as a man and it is where we thrust towards a woman. This area is deeply rooted in her subconscious and when posed properly give out strong masculine body language clues.
Relaxed open hips which stand at ease and move fluidly are the marks of a guy who easily attracts women and we should always get this handled.
Free and easy. Better yet said – Walk like you have balls and pose like it too.
We shouldn’t talk about them out loud, obviously but if we pay close attention to when we just meet a woman or when she’s appears interested in us early – it’s highly noted and documented her eyes will go there a fraction a second at a time and sometimes more often that just once or twice.
I thought it was cool when I first noticed it.
The guy Rob (who I mentioned above) was the first to point it out to me and it was perfectly played out by women when I began managing my body language. It didn’t happen at first but when it all became more natural to me it was so easy to notice.
I‘ve highlighted below specific times we can use to begin working on our body languages positive and sexual communication. Thus way we can notice the negative signals we might be putting out too.
Sometimes just not making too many mistakes with our bodies is just as good as doing something positive with them.
With our body language – a little communication goes a long way in attracting women and I will say, without at least a fair knowledge of being aware and then fixing it, it’s tough to ever be seen sexual guy.
Part of what makes a guy sexy – is our body language alone.
Study the video.
Take notice of the men and women you see everyday and you’ll start to see the signs are everywhere.
- Mirroring 0:10
- Confident 0:15
- Listening 0:21
- Hiding Something 0:49
- Authority 0:58
- Threatened 1:05
- Rejection 1:11
- Want to leave 1:16
- Defiant 1:29
- Withdrawing 1:33
- Engaged 1:44
- Hiding Anxiety 2:04
- Suppressing Speech 2:11
- Posing 2:47
- Competing Attention 3:11
- Teasing 3:17
- Obligatory hug 3:28
- Suggestive Romance 3:35
- Concealed Anxiety 3:47
- Feeling tense 3:51
- Teasing Invitation 4:16
- Flirtatious 4:22