Nice Guys escape the Friend's Zone.
Body Language IS Communication
I was out looking for apartments one day with an extremely hot girl, who happened to be a close friend. You must know by now that I used to be the nice guy that ruled the friend’s zone. The real man in me was trapped inside a confidently weak, timid, and fidgety body. My body language was that of a nice guy that just didn’t understand women. No matter what I tried, it wouldn’t work because women would see right past the exterior front that my personality offered.
Back to my hot friend….
We were being shown an apartment by a landlord. He led us room by room explaining a little and at the end of the tour, walked away to allow us a discussion in private. She liked it but I could tell she was worried the landlord would not allow us to rent from him. So instead of discussing how the apartment could serve us, she decided to mention how my legs were going to get us denied.
I looked at her in disbelief. I had no idea what she was talking about. She explained to me that my legs kept moving around while we were in front of him. She was concerned that if I appeared nervous he would assume we would not be reliable tenants.
I was definitely a little pissed at her, but mainly for my ignorance of my body language. I thought but I am a musician. I tapped on everything. My legs always danced. I also thought women liked musicians and found them attractive. I figured any woman would soon find out who I was and then she would understand why I banged on everything like it was a drum.
But I was also a little high strung and mumbled. Whenever I was speaking to a beautiful woman, my words flowed nervously.
I had no clue that so many women were ruling me out as a potential date on my body language alone. I had no clue that attraction could have something to do with my body. I thought it was about looks. Good looking men walk proudly because they got laid. Average looking jerks walked confidently because they too, got more women than even my dreams would allow me to experience.
I now see clearly how my body language communicates with women and how it can increase or decrease any attraction she might feel. I now see how important it all is and I want to share with you as much advice or tips I can find.
So keep reading and let’s get started because as the title suggests, body language is communication.
If you want to sexual communicate with anyone it must begin and continue through your body. After all you don’t have great sex by lying there and speaking to each other from across the room. Even if you do that you’re probably both masturbating anyways. And in that case you are really just showing each other how your body changes during a sexual encounter. Which can turn some people on and get them off.
If you want to communicate that your are a strong, masculine, confident man, it must begin and continue through your body. How many people do you see walking with their bodies hunched over and they basically are staring at their feet? Now how many of them do you think to yourself, “Wow! Now that must be a great man. ” You don’t. Therefore you must know without having to think about it, how to judge another person’s body communication. They can not hide it.
Now think abut some arrogant prick you have met once in your life. It could be a man or even a woman. You may not know why but you probably assumed they were hiding something, or attempting to mask an insecurity.
Think about the overly loud guy itching for attention. His acting reminds me of a child out to get something from his parent. Except the child hasn’t developed into a mature adult. But guess what? Neither has the obnoxiously loud man. If you watch that man, (be careful now I heard those types like to start fights when other guys are checking them out), you will begin to see patterns in his body language. His fists seem to clench a lot. His arms are almost always crossed. He always has a look on his face of distrust. It is very similar to the child pouting when he is not getting something he wants. They both stamp their feet in frustration and they both act out, the boy cries on the floor, and the man wines about others.
If you are wondering now,
“Yeah… that’s all wonderful Pete but, How is all this going to help me get laid. What does this have to do with being nice and getting stuck in the friend’s zone all the time?”
Relax now, impatient men are not as attractive as patient men. The nice guy that generally struggles with getting his fair of sexual experiences is impatient. How could you not be?
- The longer you don’t get it. The more you want it.
- The more you want it the more you begin to need it.
- The more you need it the faster your body language changes to match how you are thinking.
It’s a two way street. If you are impatient or desperate, your body will soon follow and you will end up with your body communicating to women that you are a needy man. He leans in too close when it is not necessary. He plays and bangs on things around him because of all the anxious energy building inside him.
Changing your beliefs or how you think affects your body. Change the way you think and soon your body will follow. Focus on your idiosyncrasies and attempt to remove them and your thinking will be clearer. And when you think more clearly your body language will be more effective at getting your point across to women. The point us nice guys need to make and reinforce with our bodies is this,
“You want me. I know you do. Because I’m a nice guy who’s confident and self-assured. And I understand women.”
Read my page on limited beliefs and watch the video by Rob Brinded. You will see my point more clearly. I also want you to understand that you can not effectively change your body language without also changing, or freeing up your limiting beliefs. They work together. If you are getting frustrated with you progress in the dating world make sure you are working on both.
I have proven without a doubt the your body does communicate and now, just by adding a few words you should begin to see how your body language can get you laid quickly.
- Using confident sexual body language is how you begin to sexual communicate with women.
- Using flirty actions with your body will communicate to women on a level that women get and are attracted to, instantly.
Try it yourself. I won’t be holding your hand when you are practicing. (In fact I’m not really into holding guy’s hands anyways. They’re much too rough for me.) It’s easy. Just substitute what you want a woman to feel towards you. One more example.
I want to communicate (to women) that I am a cool guy that can handle any hot chic’s tests she decides to throw at me.
becomes….
COOL Using relaxed, slow, and precise body language communicates that I am a cool guy. Women will then assume I know how to handle myself around any hot girl. Including her testing. Because I won’t respond out of need. I will first respond with my actions and allow the words to reinforce what my body is stating.
You should take the time to read each and every article written below, of course after reading my opinion on them. I want you to consider it your first lesson on body language.
Body Language Resources
If you would like to review one yourself just leave a comment and we will start discussing them in more detail.
| The Body Language of Sexual Attraction in Women
Not a very good article at all. In fact I was quite disappointed when I read it. If you decide to look at it keep in mind you will only walk away with this advice: •What you don’t know about body language can hurt you. •You should learn to use your body and voice to project attraction. •Hold your gaze with a woman until she looks away. |
Romantic Body Language Which Attracts Women
by Scott Patterson Keyword driven article low in content but high in search words. I’m including my review because I don’t agree with the advice given. Sure it is mildly informative but the four points listed are not on target with what I believe. Here is my advice that we don’t agree on: •Don’t blink often and when you do, blink slowly. Blinking distracts people from you. I learned in acting class when you are acting, blink less. Watch any television show or news anchor and you will begin to notice how little they actually do it. MY TIP: Watch any movie where the man playing the role is considered to be a hot guy and copy his effective facial mannerisms. |
| What is Body Language?
by Elena Solomon Great Article and wonderful advice for a beginner studying body language. I suggest you read it if you are starting your journey on becoming an attractive man, or woman. Follow her advice and it will work. Elena’s knowledge is well documented and clearly written. The most important point she makes is how to be open with your body. It is crucial to attraction of any kind. 12 Simple Rules – The little green book that became famous overnight! Find out what all the fuss is about. |
The Player: Body Language That Leads to Sex
by The Player. His writing does make mine look I’m still in high school and it does have a small share of solid advice but I was disappointed in not being able to finish reading it. Apparently you have to sign up to get the rest. If any of my readers decides to sign up and read the rest, let me know how it ends. The suspense is killing me. |
| Body Language and Tonality for Attraction
Right on! You have to read this. It’s similar to Elena’s article above but it will take you one step further. I wanted to also make note of my review on Scott’s article and paraphrase: “Slow down your movements…even BLINKING and looking around. Relax your breathing.” That proves the point I was making about blinking. I learned from it that being much too open with your body can be similar to having an overly cocky or confident attitude. It is usually seen as a compensation for something you feel you insecure about. |
The Biggest Mistakes Guys Make Reading Body Language
by Carlos Xuma What I can say…I wouldn’t support this man if I didn’t believe 99.99999% of what he teaches. This is why you will find this article on my little brat sister page, Attraction101 net. I recently had to think about how to tell if a woman is really into you when she is flirting. It occurred to me the only way to be sure is to lead the flirt and not let her follow you. In the article you’ll see direct support for this. It’s works the same way with body language and if you want to know what I’m talking about read it. You won’t be disappointed. Three points Carlos makes that I focused on was: •You can’t push a woman into feeling attraction for you. •This means that if you’re too hung up on reading body language and watching for signals, you’ll miss the real opportunity – which is to LEAD her with your own body language. •Ultimately, that’s all a woman cares about. How much fun will she feel with you when she’s with you. She’s got her radio tuned into: WII FM – “What’s In It For Me” radio… |
| Body Language Basics for Seducing Women
by Tiffany Taylor Can’t say I disagree with Tiffany and I’m not sure if I fully support her product just yet. Let me know what you guys think about it. She does however make a great point about how your outer game or your attraction with women won’t go anywhere if your body language is weak and tentative. |
Are You Making These Body Language Mistakes With Your Hands
by John Alexander Very short but informative. I can relate to the mistake of what to do with your hands. I constantly fidgeted with them and did everything John says. I didn’t realize at the time it was chipping away at the attraction a woman was feeling towards. By the end of the interaction it dwindled down to just friend’s status. Most likely not just because of what my hands were doing but I’m sure it played a big role. I suggest you read this and if you find you are performing those mistakes he mentions, fix it quickly. |
| 4 Negative, 3 Positive, 2 links, and 1 Video on Body Language to Increase Attraction.
by Peter White I don’t know who wrote this but it’s absolutely…incredibly…mind blowing. Just take a look at it. Of course I wrote and I’m not into reviewing my own posts but it’s really not that good. The video of the old man cracked me up. It does however give a more visual representation of body language. A source which seems to be rare on the web. If anything, take a look at it to laugh at poor Bob. |
Body Language
by John Alexander Another informative article written by John. He deserves credit for this one. Sure the beginnings a little overstated but keep reading because it gets better. I took away from this a reinforcement of two beliefs I hold: •Your body language must be consistent with your overall approach. Truly confident men have naturally confident body language. •Women find men that are comfortable in their own skin highly attractive. |
Welcome back. Do you feel like you have a great handle on how your body works in communicating to women? If not, give it some time. Otherwise if you’re ready to take the next step you’re going to need these tools:
- A large mirror.
- A good camera.
- A down to earth, or cool woman friend.
- Six forks, no, wait, that’s another lesson on great sex.
You must begin to put in practice what you have learned. Until you get a natural handle on what your body is communicating, and it becomes subconscious, you must pay attention to what your body is doing. You should begin to see it others quickly. It will be like a new world to you. Enjoy it!
I want you to stop back soon because my second page on body language will explain in more detail how you should walk, talk, and how to blend them effortlessly. If you can’t wait click on some of the links I offer above. I highly recommend it anyways. The depth of a purchased product can be a valuable resource for any nice guy wanting to get out of the friend’s zone, once and for all.
Related articles by Peter White
- Is there one thing a nice guy can do to have his sexual communication with women increase instantly? (dialteg.com)
- How to Read Sexual Communication, Nice Guy and The Friend’s Zone Law 3 (dialteg.com)
- Flirting While Using Sexual Communication Increases Attraction and Sparks Chemistry (dialteg.com)
- Female sexuality (scienceblog.com)
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Understanding Why Nice Guys Fail With Women?
about 6 days ago - No comments
The nice guy that learns how to attract is far more successful than the typical jerk that does not understand why he gets laid.
Go ahead and ask any woman you see and she will agree with me. If she doesn’t, I want to hear about it and I want to hear the reasons why. If she does not agree and acts stubborn about it then you also have one less woman to concern yourself over building an attraction towards you. So stay away from her. her life probably centers around jealousy and mind games in a childish attempt to control men anyways.
Nice Guys Lie to Themselves, in Their Just Friends Relationships
about 2 weeks ago - No comments
Here is the feelings of a guy I once knew in his mid twenties. He was considered a man, but he really was just a boy. A good part of him was a nice guy but the other part, a liar. The part of him, who was nice was good friends with women he More >
Can a Woman Secretly Love a Man They Put in the Friend Zone?
about 3 weeks ago - No comments
I used to think that a woman’s mind could be changed. I used to think maybe there’s a chance she likes me. Maybe there’s a chance that if I stay with her as a friend she will finally see me in a sexual role.
But that only made things worse.
I focused so much on her that I failed to see the truth of our relationship. I thought she was my one and only and I felt if I could do just one more thing for her, she would finally be attracted to me enough and feel compelled to kiss me.
No. We’re not Dating. I’m just her Friend.
about 3 weeks ago - No comments
“Wow. (slight pause) You are beautiful. (pause) Listen… I don’t want to be your friend. I don’t want to be the guy you call up at three o’clock in the morning, complaining about all the jerks in your life. I don’t want to be the man who listens to you whine about all the creepy guys that hit on you that day. And I definitely don’t want to be the man who you blow off for some great sex with a loser. I just don’t want to be him. (big pause) I want to be the guy who lights up your eyes when I enter a room. I want to be the man who you wake up in the morning thinking about, and the last person on your mind before you go to sleep. I want to be the man who will hold your hand one minute, and wrestle you to the ground the next. I want to be the man who you’ll come up with every excuse to be next to. The man that makes your mind wonder, and your heart beat just a little quicker. That’s the man I want to be and if there is even a slightest doubt in your mind that I might not be that man, tell me now, and I’ll walk away.”
How to Handle Those Not so Cool Friends
about 1 month ago - No comments
Let’s face it. We all have friends that we don’t consider to be cool. Underneath their unsociable persona they are good people. They just don’t seem to get, or care, to participate on the cool level of social interaction.
How does this affect your dating life?
Do they get in the way when you’re trying to so called get laid?
Do they hover real close making the women around you think you’re close friends, which you feel ruins your chances with her?
And how do you handle this?
Nice Guy: I’m Tired of Being a Loser With Women
about 1 month ago - No comments
Another evening goes by, The nice guy trudges his ass home, alone, tired, and frustrated. He watched yet another jerk steal the girl he had his eyes on. He talked to her for a little while but nothing came from it. He failed to ask her for her number. He failed to make her feel attracted towards him. He thought she must only like jerks. His thoughts centered around why she would put up with this guy’s shit when he could be there for her. He could show her what it felt like to be treated like a princess if she would have only give him a chance, but she didn’t!
He goes home alone again. feeling like a loser with women, feeling helpless, and clueless. He went out again feeling strong that this would be the night. This would be the night he would meet that special women that actually liked nice guys. He stood tall when he left but lost two inches and hunched over as he walked up the steps alone. Staring at the floor where he hoped a woman would soon walk. But the steps felt nothing but the weight of his despair. The steps heard nothing but his two feet and the echo rang through the hallway due to the silence. No laughter from a woman. No sweet conversation about what a good time she had. No smacking of the lips as he had hoped.
His imagination before he left had the evening finishing just the way he planned. He imagined rushing to get the keys in the door and have that magical evening of sex with a woman that finally fell for a nice guy. The beautiful girl locked in his eyes as they begin to kiss….
9 Questions to Ask Yourself if You Creep Women Out?
about 1 month ago - No comments
Without fail every time I was given the opportunity to see her again and manged to speak with her I would gather to courage to ask her out. Granted sometimes this would take months of seeing her constantly. She of course would turn me down with those dreadful phrases,
“I’m sorry I’m just not interested.”
“I have a boyfriend.”
“You’re cute but just not my type.”
“I’m sorry. I only date taller guys.”
“You’re nice but I just don’t see you that way.”
“I’m sorry. I’m taking a break from dating for while.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t give out y number to strangers.”
Do you have the balls to blow that hot girl off?
about 1 month ago - No comments
Really. Guys. Think about it. You start talking or seeing this woman. You have great conversations. You hit it off from the beginning. There’s definitely chemistry and a spark between you. But then it happens. She rarely returns your phone calls. She rarely answers her mail. Granted when she does she acts interested and into you. It’s almost like she’s knowingly or not, creating this addiction to her. She rewards you occasionally. Teases you to keep you interested. Then disappears for a while to make you wonder. WOW! Isn’t that extremely similar to what I have written to challenge women in general. The hard part about all of this is trying to figure out if she does it on purpose, if she’s just flaky, or she has so much shit going on in her life she really just does not have the time and your schedules don’t match up enough.
Top Ten Ways to Challenge Women to be Attracted to You
about 1 month ago - No comments
Let’s take two guys and one woman. And no I’m not talking about a threesome. The first guy is nice, accommodating, and generally lacks any real potential girlfriends in his life. The second guy is also nice, but very busy, and has many potential girlfriends in his life. Who’s more of a challenge?
Obviously the second guy is. I’m sure it doesn’t take a genius to realize this. Look around and you see it all over but…
How can you be that challenge when you don’t have a black book filled of girlfriends to compete over you?
How can you be a challenge when you really like a girl and want to let her know, but everyone tells you that when a woman knows you like her too early on, she will lose interest?
When is it safe to let a woman know you like her without scaring her away?
When should you let a woman know you like her before she loses interest?
and finally…
How can you be that challenge without playing games?
What is Dialteg™ and Where are the Comments?
about 1 month ago - No comments
Good afternoon everyone!
I just wanted to get the word out there about my site and to encourage more comments from my readers.
So what is Dialteg™ and how did I come up with the name?
Believe it or not I was sitting around trying to think of a wonderful domain name to start my blog. I had written Get Laid on a page of my journal/notebook and it just happened to be upside down.
And then it hit me….