Your confidence, self esteem, and lack of limited beliefs will determine your inner strength.
It will determine how you handle your problems.
It will determine your charm and magnetism when dealing with women.
The nice guy that finds himself buried in the friend’s zone consistently will often lack the skills in these areas.
Some of them may be weaker than others but they are still there.
In my searching and exploring through the advice given by leading men and women I have yet to find a method in which will guarantee complete results.
This is because YOU, and you alone must determine your methods or the order in which to proceed.
Not so much the methods but more of the order in which you feel you must proceed.
It is advisable to have your inner game developed before you completely develop your outer game.
Strength – Only the strongest excel in life or in the parts of their lives they wish to change.
Strength is NOT power.
Strength is having the fortitude to stay the path regardless of the outcome or the hardships along the way.
You have a strong personality when you are able assimilate the good parts of the people you meet into the whole of you without changing the core of yourself.
You do not have a strong personality just because you can resist another persons will onto you.
Strong confidence comes from your ability to recover quickly from any setbacks.
Strong character comes from a man who maintains a consistent strong personality and backs it up with seemingly unwavering confidence and then develops competence in many areas of his life.
Strength is also your ability to reject maturely and responsibly.
Doing the opposite will only lead you back to the first anyway.
Your “inner game” is basically your foundation.
A starting place or a jumping point.
Yet the problem I have found with complete focus on the inner game is that too many men dive so deeply into their minds that they forget to practice.
They spend hours reading theory and not much time practicing what they’ve learned. It is extremely important to practice, or put yourself out there for several reasons:
- Easier to discover your own personal skills you are missing.
- Learning from your failures, mistakes, or even successes.
- Figuring out what works for you specifically.
Being able to know which part needs more focus is actually part of your inner strength that I am talking about.
It is this strength you are developing that will give you the power to put stress on a given area at a given time.
When I first starting learning allthis it took complete inner strength to say to myself and follow through with,
“Okay today I am going to attempt to flirt with every woman I come in contact with.”
And that is what I would do.
My strength stopped me from so called “chickening out” and reverting back to my old days.
Sure it was a little strange at first considering I wasn’t much of a flirty man to begin with, but it got easier and easier as I went along.
It also took my inner strength to realize during that process that taking things to the next level, from flirting to dating was a whole new area in which I needed to work on.
How can you figure out which areas you need the most help in?
First you must decide what it is specifically that you are looking for.
You need to be very detailed and as realistic as you want.
It does not matter.
If you just want to date hot girls and have more one night stands, then write it down.
You are only limited by your determination.
If you are just looking for a long term relationship with an attractive woman then write it down.
Just be clear and precise and go into great detail.
Write something like this using more sex as an example, because who doesn’t really want more sex unless you are an overworked porn star:
- I want more sex.
- I want enjoyable and more frequent sex.
- I want attractive women to want to have more sex with me.
- I want more enjoyable and much more frequent sex with hot, attractive women.
- I want to be a man that hot smart women with great sense of humor are drawn towards having more sex with me.
Write a simple phrase of what you’re looking for. Then be more specific with the keywords like sex, and women. Keep going as far as necessary.
This can even be changed with time as you grow through your experiences.
Who knows maybe you will start looking for more sex but wind out finding you just want a long lasting relationship. It’s all up to you and your particular goals.
Next you must determine HOW you are going to get it.
This is not as easy but it goes something like this.
“How do I become a guy that hot smart women with a great sense of humor are drawn towards having more sex with?”
Now turn the question towards yourself.
What type of men do attractive women really want?
Now you can begin to research the hows and your inner strength will be the factor in which you follow through.
It will help to make sure you get a handle on those issues or skills you feel that are needed.
It will aid you in staying on the right course.
Your inner strength will allow you to decide which path you will need to stay on course.
Keep in mind it’s all a process and some will progress quicker than others. You gain a little confidence. Your self esteem is boosted through a success.
You get a little stronger inside which allows you to handle your failures better which in turn makes your more confident.
They are all so connected that giving focus to one of those areas will more than likely boost another area.
How strong you are will also inadvertently allow you to handle of few aspects of the nice guy dilemma of being too nice, and failing to step out of the friend’s zone for good.
Refusing to do a woman’s bidding because you find her attractive and want her to like you requires strength to stand your ground and tell her “NO”.
When you begin to notice a woman’s testing of you, this will require a strong attitude to NOT break your composure.
The stronger you become the better equipped you will be to handle those situations.
But also handle those situations in a very masculine and attractive way.
It reminds me of a Seinfeld episode where George and Jerry are watching a couple eating close by. She is crying heavily yet the man continues to eat and not give in.
I am not suggesting that you should never console a crying woman but there will be many circumstances you will find yourself in that the woman will test you through drama.
And these are the times in which you should not give in to avoid being a “wuss” or a pushover.