Let me know if you have experienced a “sudden” lose of attraction from a woman. Almost as if she’s trying to hide it from you…
- You caught her eyes staring and when you approached her, she blew you off like you didn’t even exist. Was she hiding it because there was other people around?
- You’ve been good friends and she’s always flirting, but for some reason when you get close she pulls away. You hang out a lot and she’s always contacting you. Is she hiding it, hoping and waiting you’ll make a move?
- She’s extremely shy around you. Barely says a word. It feels like she’s “into” you but you’re just not sure. You still have great conversations which open her up a little. Is her confidence so low she hides liking you, because she can not believe you’d like her back?
- You get along extremely well and you “click,” but she talks about other guys and how it’s so hard to find a good one. All the while you’re thinking, “Hey, why not me!” Is she hiding it from you because she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship?
I’m not here to “hide” the answers from you so I’ll get right to it.
It’s in a woman’s best interest to hide her attraction BUT… and this is a huge but, only the most shallow, superficial, manipulative women can ever truly hide her emotions.
Luckily I believe in both our sexes. I believe most folks are just plain nice whether they want to admit it or not.
The order of mating is predictable. You feel attraction. You build rapport or a connection. You begin to feel “safe” to open up which typically progresses to a more intimate physical connection.
In her world – that same initial attraction is a little different than yours. For her to get past the rapport to safety or intimacy she needs to know you are, who you say you are.
This means just because she’s physically attracted to you from afar or catches you eye, her best interest is to have you prove yourself by testing you. You could fail the test by acting like every other guy or you could fail the test by not responding confidently to her cold rejection. That test usually depends on the situation and who she is.
You see how you feel that sudden physical attraction may be enough for you to feel comfortable getting physical (and then figure out who she is) – but for most women it’s not enough. She needs more.
Imagine the most manipulative woman you have ever met and how good she was at making you believe something. Notice how good she was at controlling her outward emotions. She’s a five star actress. That’s the only type of women I know of who could hide her attraction.
I’ve found the reality of it all is through a woman’s eyes, body language, the tone of her voice, the little “tells” she has, even down to the ways she sits are practically impossible for any “nice” woman to hide.
The signs may not always be clear but they are well beyond her control. Carlos wrote a simple but effective post explaining all the signals a woman will give you - How to Tell If A Woman Is Interested In You.
This one is outside DiaLteG but it covers all the basics without fluff or hype - Body language: Female courtship signals (syncrat.com)
So when she’s testing you, or “trying” to hide her attraction, and when she is focusing on all that stuff - her unconscious mind WILL find a way to let you know.
Before I wrap this up I feel it’s important to warn you about the friends zone…
Most women are NOT hiding their feelings of attraction to men who they have put in the “friends zone.
When she’s done testing she’s not feeling that spark. When she’s constantly upping her tests to new levels, this means she is highly attracted to you.
A good friend of mine commented this a while ago:
Oooh yeah, I consider myself an attractive woman so if I’m putting you threw the tests bear with me it means your worth the time to figure out.
If you want to learn more about her tests please read my entire page a woman’s test Understanding A Woman’s Test and How To Pass Them.
I also wanted to make sure I pass on to you some of the best advice I have ever received on this subject:
Stop looking around for signals from women that they’re “interested” in you.
Stop CARING whether or not a particular woman is interested in you.
Instead, start TRIGGERING the interest, and watching to see if women ENGAGE. If they do, then assume that IT’S ON!
Basically just assume a woman’s into you. If you interact with her long enough to create that initial spark of attraction, don’t question it – just go with it.
Trust me she’ll let you know if you were wrong. You’ll save yourself lots of time and heartaches chasing down women who don’t want you this way.
That has worked for me positively far more than it has let me down. It can work for you too.
And whatever you do, please – never ask Nice Guy Tip 12 – Do You Like Me? Those four little words can destroy attraction quicker than bad breath. She’ll go from hiding it to not feeling it.Y
Yes. It’s true. Women do hide their attraction because it is in their best interest to test you first.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
there are just so many no good women anymore unlike years ago when they seem to be looking for men. but today, many of the women now don’t even want to be bothered at all. i seem to meet the nasty women that have an attitude problem, and are so very hard to start a conversation with. so how can a good STRAIGHT MAN these days meet a decent woman, now that many of them are like this? i am not doing anything WRONG on my part, and i just hope to meet a woman that doesn’t play games, and just hope that she can accept me for who i am. now many women today are looking for the RICH men instead, and it is very sad that the women have changed their attitude and many of them think that they are all that. since many women have very high paying jobs now, they think that they are high and mighty. that is why it was certainly much easier meeting women years ago, and they did not have the advantages that they have now.
i seem to meet all the low life ones myself, and many of them are into other women now.
I understand. Playing games seems to be a big part of dating. But it’s actually always been that way. You have the good games and the bad ones too. It’s also my opinion that money – or security has always been on the top of a woman’s list with regards her future.
And I used to let it get to me the same way Franko mentions above.
Of course I will admit I never met too many “low lifes” as Jay mentions. Maybe I just saw them as not an option anyways so I never classified them as a dating option. Far as I’m concerned they could have been gay anyways.
Now I’ve come to the conclusion or realization that “where” I meet women seem to make the difference in who they happen to be. Generally speaking of course.
Where are you meeting all these women Jay? Maybe I can help you out.
Games, games, games… I don’t buy it. Maybe I’m too old for it, or realize that time is so short.. Or both. But I think if 2 people like each other, they should just be honest, express it and get on with starting a relationship. I don’t see the benefit of game-playing, aside from the sado-masochistic pleasure of mentally torturing yourself and/the other person. I think when you get older, you want to cut through the bullshit and get to the point. I like you, you like me, let’s get together and see what happens.. Simple. Life is too short. Carpe Diem.. Ditch the games. Just my two cents.
Thanks for sharing Epf.
Always great hear everyone’s two cents.
Since I’m a huge fan of “My Name is Earl” your comment reminded me of this song….
http://youtu.be/E-DeVRQtY4c
Simple and to the point.