Are You Quiet & Shy Around Women? Is This Why They Don’t Like You?

"Reason for failing with women #10 - You Were Timid, Quiet, or Too Shy Around Her – You Reject Yourself Often and/or Women Feel Rejected By You."

You're not the loudmouth at the party. Your social life doesn't include a hundred friends. You have a good close family and a few great friends you're actively involved with, and that's all you need to enjoy life.

You're a little quiet, somewhat shy, and you like to take things at your own, slightly slower pace than average.

Yet, for some reason it feels like women don't like you all that much because of your somewhat soft demeanor.

Is this the truth?

Could it really be the reason why or is something else going on with your non-existent relationships with women?

In today's post I'm going to give you every opportunity to get past your shyness and break out of your shell, if that's what you want.

A real plan so this is never a problem again.

And of the reality behind what is really going on.

First up...

Guess what man?

Lots of great women DO fall for shy and quiet guys ALL the time.

Which means...

If you're thinking that it's because you're shy or a little timid and this is why you're failing with women, you're only partly right.

I can guarantee it's not happening for you because of these two main reasons and of course an obvious third reason.


  • You failed to make some sort of intimate move on her at the right time.


  • She felt rejected by you because of it.

It’s not the necessarily your shyness that pushed her away. It’s because when you’re overly timid or hesitant in this area, she doesn’t know where you at, how you feel about her, where you’re going with her, and because you won’t take the necessary lead.

You're waiting around for her instead of taking charge and you're not being realistically proactive, plus you're holding on to a false belief that women don't go for the shy guys.

Something I cover extensively in my online book specifically in this chapter:

22 Signs & Signals Of Interest & Attraction Women Show Men - Why Wait For HER Signs When You Can Create Them Inside Her Towards You

You're rejecting yourself before it even happens. Before you even know if she actually does like you or not.

And as stated above, some women are actually feeling rejected by YOU!

And the all-too-obvious number three:

  • You're not meeting and interacting with enough women to give yourself a even half a chance of attracting one. You're not communicating to women in a way which makes you a sexual option so the friend's zone is where you find yourself often living.

The solution to this "shy and quiet" problem might seem like a no-brainer and it's probably the reason why you haven't tried or failed to get past it:

Overcome your shyness and problem solved, right?


There's unfortunately no direct correlation between being quiet and shy and not being good with women, therefore fixing your shyness or suddenly becoming the life of the party is not a guarantee women will automatically become attracted to you.

I mean, sure, it might work a little because you're doing something different and in the very least giving yourself the opportunity for a change to happen, but it's still not a guarantee.


It's much harder to overcome being shy and social awkward or anxious in a crowd than it is to learn how to attract women which is why so many men and women struggle getting past it.

The real solution does (in part) make it easier to achieve success when the shyness is taken care of ONLY because it can help as in meeting more women, feeling more confident, and being more free to communicate  attractively.

A real plan you can start using today to use your shyness attractively and/or overcome it entirely.

Giy Not Shy Anymore Meeting Woman

Constantly and consistently work on your social nervousness or shyness through confidence building techniques, re-framing your beliefs, all the while learning the ability to start seeing things from other people perspectives.

Members of DiaLteG™ get this as part of the whole package to help you out:

How To Get Rid of Your Public Fears - No More Social Anxiety or Being Shy

You can also buy it as a single page if you like.

A few small steps a day can go a very long way so don't push too far ahead because it can be overwhelming and discouraging too.

BUT still...

You must get out and face your fears for it to happen.

You can do some things at home however finding the courage to face your fears MUST be practiced as often as possible.

As you're working on your shyness and social anxiety, make sure you give yourself a real boost in confidence.

This will help you with the shy thing and also make you naturally more attractive to lots of great women who deserve to meet someone like you.

Here's a few posts to look at:

How To Be Confident Around Women – No Experience Needed?

Why Confidence Is So Attractive to Women, What It Is, & How To Get It Quickly

While you're doing all that you MUST find a way to get past this negative belief that women don't fall for or feel attracted  shy and quiet guys because they do... a lot!

Read these two posts and I promise to help and convince you that despite your shyness, or even some of your anxieties - you can use it to your advantage.

That's the whole plan.

Very simple, isn't it?


Do your limited beliefs exercises to overcome any and all social anxiety you have, which may or may not include being shy.

The more important part is the social anxieties which are holding you back from meeting women.

The shyness - not a big as deal you might expect.


Convince yourself one way or another through learning and real-world knowledge, something I show in the posts above, that despite being a shy and quiet guy  you CAN certainly attract lots of women.


Work on building your confidence and self-esteem because without those, all may be lost and useless as you're interacting with women.

Yes - you can and must NOT avoid this step. I won't apologize. It's a MUST!

How To Be Confident Around Women – No Experience Needed?

Why Confidence Is So Attractive to Women, What It Is, & How To Get It Quickly


Learn why and how you might be rejected YOURSELF before a woman even does, because I've found lots of shy guys do that way too much.

Here's your assignment - so to speak:

Are You Qualifying Her? – Attracting Women & Better Relationships

Attracting Women Nice Guy Tip 4 – How To Stop Disqualifying Yourself

In other words, you really have to get over the fact that you may not feel good enough or capable because you ARE!

On the side - I understand your fears and anxiety of rejection may hold you back from making the first move and taking the lead, so read these:

When It’s Time To Make Your First Move On Her – No Fears – Go For It!

Afraid Of Making A Move On Her? Getting To And Past That First Kiss

Handling Rejection – Never Feel Sorry for Yourself Because You Were Rejected


If it's not obvious, you're probably not meeting enough women.

Although this will be the toughest part for you, aside from learning the skills that actually do attract women - which is a necessity for ANY man, shy or not... something you can learn easily get here:

How To Use Secret Communication And Sexual Body Language To Attract Women...

It's not an impossibility and if you've gone this far, you're going to be just fine.

Here are my links to help you meet more women:

Post in the Category: Meeting – Approaching – Opening – Starting Conversations – No Fears

Develop A Social Life, Get Involved, and Give Something Women Do Want

Where  to Meet Women and Removing Fears Of Approach Naturally

Time for the conclusion and some final words.

This reason - being shy and quiet - is just one reason why you (or any other guy) might be failing with women, but it's a solvable problem once you have a plan that works and you actually follow through with it.

Sure - getting past the social awkwardness can help but it's NOT the main reason because women DO like shy and quiet guys.

You most likely (if you're meeting women) failed to make a clear intimate move at the right time, and women are feeling rejected by you.

You're not taking the lead and following through with it because of fears and doubt in yourself coming from many different areas of your life.

You're waiting too much and for too long hoping a woman will do for you, what you are expected to do as a MAN.

So make sure you read this chapter:

22 Signs & Signals Of Interest & Attraction Women Show Men - Why Wait For HER Signs When You Can Create Them Inside Her Towards You

Obviously, if you're not meeting women because of this problem, then your chances of success go down...

Way down!

BUT even if you did charge all that, it's not a guarantee because you STILL need the SKILL of attractive communication.

Something you can get here right here:

How To Use Secret Communication And Sexual Body Language To Attract Women

Do your limited belief exercises.

Follow along with each and every step and this problem goes away... Period!


Opening Image by Lázaro Revoledo found at Pexels.

This was from the quick versions you’ll find on this page:

Why SHE Didn’t Like You, Why Girls Don’t Like You, & What You Can Do To Start Changing That Today… and Forever!

Thank You For Sharing On Social Media:

About the Expert: Peter White – Dating and Attraction Expert. Creator of DiaLteG™. (dial – teg) Thanks for stopping by and giving me the opportunity to teach you a little something about women.

Discuss & develop your skills in dating and attracting women:

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The article is posted in these Categories: Attractive Mindsets – A Different Positive Way Of Looking At Everything, Mistakes – Knowing What They Are & Finding Out How To Fix Them Easily, Truth Reality or Myth – Your Limited Beliefs Are Everywhere

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9 comments… add one
  • Karl

    Hi Pete – I am a very quiet and shy guy and have never experienced intimacy at all. My life experience has shown me that no woman wants me on a sexual level. I take care of myself, do well financially, have many hobbies, etc., but never approach women, even those I find incredibly sexually attractive because there is no point. Guys have to compete for women’s interest. Other guys are of interest to women but I’m simply not. The fact is I cannot attract any woman on a sexual level so I’m stuck.

    • WHY Karl, why don’t you think you the interest is not there? Listen, NO man is your competition, women compete for MEN! Answer my question, or at why do chics facebook group, and we WILL get to the bottom of this for you. I do NOT want to feel this way anymore! This changes starting today… You’re not stuck, you’ve just found a way out… use it or continue on your path. That’s your choice.

      • karl

        Hi Pete – thanks for responding so quickly. My reason for thinking there is no interest is that no woman has ever shown any and when I have tried to show interest in the past, it has definitely not been reciprocated, i.e., not even once. In order for a woman to be interested in a guy in a sexual way, he has to have a certain kind of presence – and compared to other guys, I literally have none.

        • You’re welcome Karl – first, yeah, women don’t like to show interest in a guy right away (generally speaking of course because they have and will) for lots of reasons which is not important right now.

          Second – Okay, you tried to show interest and failed, but HOW it’s done is most important here. Attractively speaking. “Not even once” doesn’t count. I get it, you’ve failed, but this reliance on a limited belief of “not even once” will hinder or slow you down from achieving success. We’re not talking about playing the lottery. The odds ARE in your favor. If you want to play the lottery and expect to win, and not even once after a couple of years you don’t hit that jackpot, it’s because the ODDS are NOT in your favor – not even once is EXPECTED – but when it comes to women, this logically way of looking at it, is just plain wrong, and the strange part is, you KNOW that, don’t you?

          Third – Comparing yourself to “other” guys is a waste of time. LEARNING from them, is not! So what, other guys got it and you don’t – really doesn’t say much about you and your capabilities, does it? Watch and LEARN from them because you will soak it all in. Stop comparing, it’s again a feeling you have of it being logically, but when it comes to attraction women, LOGIC does NOT nor it will ever prove to be true.

          Fourth – yes, presence helps – but I’m sensing you believe you don’t have the capacity to create this presence for yourself, AND you’ve never tried to do it with body language, mannerisms, and conversational approaches. So in reality, you’ve TRIED to show interest, but you didn’t TRY to work on those three very important pieces which WILL deem you as a sexual man to women. Tell me if I’m wrong, and if so, WHAT did you try, and why don’t you think it didn’t work. (Not why it didn’t work, but why YOU personally think it didn’t work for YOU.)

          Karl – listen, I HEAR you. If you’ve read my shit, you must have heard me talk about my music before. I must’ve been the ONLY guy to get on stage and NOT get laid from it. I thought, THOSE guys are getting their fair share, guess I’m not sexually attractive. Seemed logical BUT I was entirely wrong. I certainly blamed it on lots of things like: I don’t play what they want to hear – It’s because I did mostly acoustic work – It’s because I didn’t wow them with the latest and sappiest heart bullshit song those OTHER guys played… all EXCUSES.

          The REASON it didn’t happen for me is because I for one, looked past the average or less than women who quite literally creamed in their pants at me, and set my eyes on the big prize – AND for them – I was literally a freaking wussy boy who believed I had to kiss their ass.

          That’s the main reason I failed with getting laid back then… Lots of women wanted me but I wanted MORE and had no clue (conversationally and socially) to make it happen. Until now…

          So, you can not obviously rely on women to show interest in you UNLESS you make them believe and feel you’re an interesting person who isn’t going to kiss their ass or let THEM decide if they want you or not. That’s YOUR decision.

          Men are the pursuers. Sounds like you’re doomed because of that but NOPE – it means YOU decide whom to pursue and the only thing they can do about it – is entice or draw you in. This means YOU ARE THE LEADER. If you ask me, THEY have gotten the shaft, literally and figuratively, mostly – WE make the call to pursue, they don’t!

          Your last words were, “I Have none.”

          The simple answer is – GET SOME KARL!

          AND you don’t have to give up being a good guy at all. You just have to watch, listen, learn, and practice, AND to START seeing things from a perspective that many of your traits can be sexually attractive to women, IF you learn how to communicate what you already have to them.

          My point: Your words to me, truthfully, you can handle it, sound a little whinny, like you’ve given up, like you’re a boy who wants to beg for approval from his Mother – or whatever… and that is 99% of the reason why women don’t think you have this presence you talked about.

          But that’s good news because it means you KNOW EXACTLY what to do about it…

          The next time you interact with a woman – REMEMBER these words. ACT like a man who is the pursuer and SHE has to entice you to pursue her. ACT like a sexual guy by flirting with her with no expectation outcome.

          Do the opposite of what you wrote me and things will change real quick between you and women – just remember along the way to LEARN the skills, learn how to talk with women in this new way – and since you’re a guy, you’ve got a dick: Women don’t! It’s not ALL they want but it’s the major differentiation between heterosexual men and women that bring them together.

          Let me know what you think.


        • Karl

          “Men are the pursuers. […] – it means YOU decide whom to pursue…” Exactly men choose who to pursue, *but* women *choose* from among the men who pursue them. Other guys have what it takes to be selected. I don’t – and no amount of watching others could change that. Whatever authentic quality other men have that attracts women at a sexual level is inherent to them – I don’t have it. Thanks for trying to help, Pete – there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with me – it’s just that some of us are just not supposed to be sexually visible – so we cannot be.

        • Dude – Karl – don’t make me come over there and proverbially smack you up!!! Yeah – you’re right, some men have this sexual thing which is inherent to them. But who cares – let them have their glory, most of them fuck it up anyways because their inner work is absolutely disgusting!

          Sure, there’s nothing “wrong” with you – you’ve got the goods, you’re born a man. End of story.

          But you’re still missing the big picture – being sexually visible is NOT important to REAL women. They just don’t give a shit, they’re more concerned or worried about being sexual VISIBLE TO YOU – because they know that’s how it’s supposed to be to men, and they’re wrong too.

          The sexuality of a man does not come from his PICTURE – it comes from how, through communication, you make her, them FEEL!!!!

          Think about all the ugly non-sexually looking dudes fucking their women right now – who are getting off – who are experiencing deep orgasms – who are deeply and forever in love with this apparently ugly fucking dude – they just don’t care Karl, they don’t!!!

          ALL they care is about HOW you connect with them and make them feel something.

          AND I know for a fact it’s a SKILL you can learn too. Screw the few who are interested in pecks and a tight ass. They don’t matter. Their problems will follow them forever and they will ALWAYS be unhappy. Let them be…


          26 Traits Women Find Sexy – How To Become A Sexual Guy Despite Your Looks

          Keep coming Karl – I’ll keep on passionately working on you. Do NOT GIVE UP!

          You’re pissing me off and I LOVE it. 🙂 YOU are the reason I do this shit… because I’ve been there.

          WE, men, have it easy – we can literally talk a woman into believing we’re the sexiest man on earth.

          It’s time you start using your manhood as the advantage “inherently” given to you.


        • Karl

          Hi Pete – “we can literally talk a woman into believing we’re the sexiest man on earth…” – but only if we authentically believe it ourselves first. And I do not believe that about myself – for even a second because that would be delusional. I am not sexy at all and it has *nothing* to do with my looks. It’s how I know myself inside – and there is literally nothing to attract a woman sexually there. Observing other guys actually makes me feel worse. That’s what I mean when I say that whatever other guys have that allows them to attract women at a sexual level – I do not have.

        • Belief in yourself is certainly important BUT – you’re missing the point – being sexy is state of mind (mostly), therefore change your mindset, see it from that perspective, and delusional thinking doesn’t have to happen. Being sexy is YOUR CHOICE which means it exists in your mind – and if your mind doesn’t believe it or see it – than CHANGE your way of thinking. It’s something the human brain not only loves to do, but is capable of… totally.

          No games needed, no delusions, SEE the world the way you want it to be and it WILL BE that way – which includes your sexiness to women.

        • karl

          Hi Pete – you say here and elsewhere that “being sexy is state of mind (mostly), therefore change your mindset”. For me to be ‘sexy’ is to be able to arouse sexual interest in others. OK, maybe it is a state of mind – but I honestly don’t know how to change my mindset such that I believe (based in zero evidence, btw), that I am sexy. I have never felt it in my life, and have never gotten a sign from any woman that she finds me sexy either.