I did not live at home past the age of 21 or 22, not sure which – so this “problem” is not one I have direct experience with, BUT – I sure know of it, have seen it, and can certainly speak about it, so I will.
Living with your parents for a long time can surely put a strain on your dating/attraction life but it doesn’t have to be that way.
Here are the real problems associated with this so you can begin to solve this problem:
- A lack of courage and a failure to take risks.
- A Pre-rejection of yourself.
I DO understand that some guys live with their parents because they need to take care of one or both of them, and that’s cool man – it really is.
Aside from that reason which isn’t a big problem when she finds out the real reason you’re doing it, it’s not all that you’re too old to be living with your parents – it’s what it represents or shows about you that is causing women to NOT like you.
PRE-REJECTION or rejecting yourself.
Yes, as stated above, living with your parents can certainly make a few parts of dating difficult but this is usually limited to the later stages such as inviting her back to your place and when you decide to date exclusively.
Mostly though – I’ve found many guys just avoid dating or reject themselves from dating because they’re older and still living with their parents.
A great friend of mine was in the predicament and sadly so, being path the age of thirty made things quite a difficult thing to get past.
Imagine when the conversation comes up – HOW do you tell a woman at that age you’re stilling living at home? Do you just avoid the topic and hope she figures it out AFTER she’s already hooked on you? Is it something you should being up early just in case, to spare the heartache later on down the road?
Is it just easier to not date and avoid the whole modernly embarrassing subject altogether?
Yeah – I certainly felt for him in many ways so I get it! I really do.
Rejecting yourself or avoid dating entirely seems like the only solution.
A lack of courage and a failure to take risks.
In my friend’s case above it wasn’t so black and white. His Mother needed some help, his Father wasn’t all together AND while his 20’s flew by, he realized something which he found more important than doing the whole dating thing – something he didn’t like all that much anyways.
He has decided to cut his losses and focus on his later years. Living at home meant he could save tons of money because he was living with a few others to share the cost – which meant his savings rose and rose faster than mine.
Actually, in that time – while I got more in debt – his wealth was building and he was smart enough to grow it exponentially. So you may argue – who was really the smarter man, him or me?
Yet – his case is something of a relic from the past AND certainly played a part in his inability to meet and find the woman of his dreams. From his limited beliefs and stubbornness to use the skills he had to attract a woman, definitely meant putting his “family life” on hold far until his later years.
Some accept that and are willing, like him.
But I fear most don’t or aren’t entirely with him. They want a family, they want to date around, they want to explore and experiment with commitment and to get it right.
So for them – it comes down to FEARS – an unwillingness to risk living paycheck to paycheck or in poverty, and to be courageous enough to go out on their own, despite the horrible consequences which might happen.
Unfortunately – avoiding risks and not taking life on “mano -y- mano” (man to man) is extremely unattractive to lots of women.
Which makes for a much bigger problem and much harder to overcome.
It’s not that all women want a guy with a great career and lots of cash to throw around, that’s just a bonus to them…
In reality – they want a guy who is willing and capable to take EVERYDAY RISKS that they can get behind, follow, and/or be inspired by that they find so amazingly attractive about a guy.
AND when you’re avoiding it all by still living with your parents…
Using it as an excuse to avoid dating…
Rejecting yourself prematurely because of it and the excuse of it…
Simply makes you an UNATTRACTIVE man to women, and they just won’t like you in that way all that much!
Can you blame them?
Sure, some of you will answer yes but the truth is, it’s YOUR choice and not theirs. You’ve made your bed (or your Mom still does) and you’ve decided to give up, or to take the easy way through life – and so you will have to take FULL responsibility for it.
The solution to this specific woman problem is quite obvious IF you’re willing…
Move out and face the fears and risks, and consequences of your actions.
Own up to it and NEVER use it as an excuse as to why women don’t like you.
ATTRACTION supersedes almost everything!
Meaning – creating it (attraction) and getting a woman emotionally involved with you, can and will disrupt many of these issues – IF and only IF you create it the right way.
If moving out is not an option, the solution is even more simple, face your nice guy fears of being one of the “good” bad guys.
Meaning – if you want to live in your parents basement, play online video games, create your Lego universe with trains and such – avoid dating and women altogether then sure – you’re probably going to fail and not give yourself ANY chance for a great relationship.
But if you take that life and devote more time to doing something ELSE which gets you out, then ADD a little EDGE to your life and PERSONALITY that immediately conveys to women…
I live in my parents basement.
I have a Lego fort there too. Been building it for twenty years.
I play online games a lot and enjoy the shit out of it.
BUT – it’s not going to stop me from attracting you.
There’s another EDGE about me. There’s something deeper inside me.
I KNOW things. (Big coy smile.)
I UNDERSTAND how to communicate to women, and how to talk about my life (be it nerdy or not) in a way which YOU (a woman) find fascinating and extremely open and confident – and you (a woman) WILL find irresistible…
AND if you don’t like it, if you don’t like those things about me – then it’s a shame, because these traits which have brought me to live my life in this way, when used correctly and attractively – is something deep down you know to absolutely contain a big part of what you want in a man!
So – here it is – here I am…
And if that ATTITUDE doesn’t work (along with knowing how to talk to women) then give a little more edge whether it’s superficial or something cool you want to explore and you’ll push ANY woman over the edge of blowing you off, to dealing with your online GAME-NIGHT, give you the opportunity to play on Wednesday, and take her out on Thursday…. she’ll get over it.
You know she will… women are really COOL like that under ATTRACTIVE circumstances!
Here’s the solution to still living with your parents once again, narrowed down, with a little more help:
Option 1: Move out. Take the risk. Face the consequences.
Yeah, it’s not all that simple. You’ll still need to learn how to actually create attraction in a woman, how it happens, why it does, and the best (easiest way to do it consistently), while at the same time eliminating the mindset that (now that money is probably much tighter) – it doesn’t matter to most women.
Read my chapter for more information:
Buy this for the how, it’s very inexpensive and proven:
Option 2: Accept things the way they are, no excuses, and add a little edge to your life and personality so living at home, won’t really matter that much at all.
Women LOVE a bad boy (even more when they’re actually a good guy) and YES, living at home even later on in life doesn’t mean you can not be one.
You just have to learn how to handle it correctly.
Here are the articles you can read to get you headed in the right direction…
Learn what separates the jerks, assholes, players, and the true ATTRACTIVE bad boy:
A few slightly different views and perspectives:
A VERY important read so you don’t go over to the dark side:
How to integrate some bad boy elements into your life, while still retaining your good guy image and morals:
A great free pdf from Carlos Xuma, an expert in this field who literally wrote the book on bad boys and attraction:
And now it’s time for the quick conclusion…
It’s not too difficult to realize how tough dating can be if you’re older and still living with parents.
I can only imagine how I would’ve handled it so I make no judgement on your choices. It could’ve destroyed me.
But that’s neither here nor there.
What’s important for this post, reason #16 for failing with women, is that you now have a clear FIX for it, and you have a few options too.
You can choose both – which will give you the BEST results, or choose one and stick with it.
Whatever your choice may be – you don’t have to let this problem stop you anymore.
Living with your parents is certainly not the whole of it, therefore it’s fixable as long as you don’t perceive it in any other way, OR use it as an excuse to do nothing about it.
Find every short answer that you’re failing with women right here:
Image by Marius Venter – found at Pexels.