This is about understanding what women really want and if an average dude like us, can ever actually achieve a superior and truthful real knowledge of women in such a way, he can create or trigger attraction in her anytime he wants.
Countless men for about a million years have struggled with this question. Even before humans could effectively use speech the average man, I'll assume, struggled to comprehend the inner workings of the female mind.
Why is that?
Is it because our minds are hard-wired different?
Is it because our instincts dictate our behaviors to procreate successfully and keep our species alive?
Is it because mans logic driven brains simply can not think like a female. We can not actually put ourselves in the proverbial shoes of a woman.
(Especially if she's wearing 6 inch stilettos! Right?)
Is it all the reasons I've listed above... and more?
If you have found yourself, as an "average man" (a generalized term I use meaning: Men who don't fit into the category of drop dead gorgeous, rich and famous ) stating to your guy friends that you just don't understand women... you're not alone.
Look around and listen closely to the way women and men interact and you will see the same drawn out pattern.
A frustrated look on her face, and a dumbfounded and occasionally annoyed look on his face. Pay close attention how his attitude turns somewhat condescending towards her and how this only annoys her even more.
BUT... I wouldn't be writing this if I didn't believe that the average man could understand women.
I think it IS totally and fully possible.
I also think it is possible to logically breakdown the amazing female mind and use this information to give her what she truly desires the most:
- A real man to listen to her, respond with affirmation, and repeat as many times as needed.
- A real man her emotions can connect with on many different levels.
- A real man to just be there for her, and unpredictably give her movie like experiences she can brag to her friends about.
The list goes on but let's get right to the point:
Men tend to confuse two different things where women are involved which causes a huge misunderstanding.
What she prefers. What she says she wants. They are fluid and ever-changing.
They are her conscious thoughts and some of them are based on how she is feeling that moment, that day, that week, that month, or the last relationship she was in.
Her preferences are thought out somewhat logically.
You must or should NEVER change your life or lifestyle or whatever to match a specific woman's preference. Once you do, you'll be that much farther from understanding women and attracting them too.
Something which is beyond her control.
Desires are subconscious.
Our instincts drive them.
When we find ourselves (generally) wanting something and not being able to explain exactly why, we are experiencing a small form of desire.
If you change your life to fit into a woman's true desires, you'll be taking a major step towards what very few men experience, a never-ending stream of women just wanting you around in some way.
You will be that much more attractive to women in general.
Let me put it in little different for you so you can truly grasp this concept:
When you hear a woman say how she wants a nice guy, or a tall, dark, and handsome guy (which seems to be a popular preference) - that's what she prefers. It has nothing to do with her desires.
When you create attraction in a woman towards you, you effectively override her normal preference and you tap into her REAL DESIRES.
Something she has no control over.
That's how you find short ass dudes like me getting women who claimed they only date tall guys.
That's how you see average dudes with hotter women who really don't have any money or anything superficial to offer.
We won't be getting into a long discussion on attraction...
Especially because THAT book has already been written in it's purest form. As far as I'm concerned NOTHING will ever explain attraction better or more eloquently and perfect than Attraction Isn't A Choice.
So yes, you MUST BUY it because I'm not allowed to copy it word for word for you. I'm a good guy who follows the rules of the money game.
You want to understand women better... understand this:
Respect her preferences. Acknowledge them. Just the same as you prefer a certain type of woman does not mean you can not feel attracted to another look or type.
But do NOT change who you are, what you do, how you do it, and how you live your life to match any one woman's preference... ever.
If you meet a woman who likes guys who ride motorcycles, don't go out and buy a bike expecting her to suddenly fall head over heels for you.
On the other end:
You gain and build her attraction to you by setting up your life to better connect with her DESIRES.
You see it's not the "bike" she's attracted to, she feels an uncontrollable attraction to guys who get her excited.
And you don't have to become a bad-ass live on the edge type of guy to get a woman excited. If that was the case we'd all be fucked, wouldn't we?
- Make your life exciting in the smallest ways and she will connect with it.
- Be an exciting person to talk to and she will connect her desires to YOU.
- Live YOUR life with passion and women WILL connect their passions with YOU.
I realize connecting to her desires is a much harder thing to grasp or understand.
Trust me that I spent more than half my life trying to fit into a woman's preferences and failed miserably in doing it... until I realized it was the WRONG way to create attraction.
The process of understanding the differences between preference and desires can be broken down:
Start listening to women as much as you can talk about their wants, needs, and desires.
If you don't have an endless stream of friends then go on any social media site and start reading.
Start taking notes. REAL notes.
You'll want to first pick out what would be a desire and what would be a preference. Start noticing the difference.
If you find ONLY PREFERENCES then you must locate or find the DESIRE behind it.
The root of all woman's preferences start with her desire. So it's always there somewhere.
Start noticing how her preferences tend to change based on the guy.
Take and give your full attention to her actual desires and those feelings of attraction which ARE BEYOND HER CONTROL.
Third - ask yourself HOW you can CONNECT with those desires.
(Remember you don't want to match her preferences. Don't make that mistake. If you're failing with women and have been for a while, I guarantee that's what you've been doing all along.)
Yes, the third step is the most difficult but it's where the good stuff is loacted.
It's where you learn how to create attraction. I
t's where you learn to trigger it in a woman whenever you want... and that's a very good feeling.
No worries, I'm going to help you out a bit here. Just for starters.
Imagine a woman saying she's like a big strong guy with muscles. It's what she prefers.
The key word being STRONG.
So how do you appeal to the her real DESIRES behind the preference of STRONG?
It's not his physical strength. It's how he makes her feel. Safe around him. Able to open up to. Someone she can rely on. A guy she feels protected around.
Those are her real desires. What she's saying is merely her conscious thinking which brought her to the conclusion of what she prefers.
To connect to her desire of strength is easy.
Emotionally support a woman and she'll feel safe opening up to you.
Be a reliable person and she'll see that as a strength.
The protection she seeks is not all physical, she has an instinctual need or desire feel feel emotional protected.
Here's a great read to understand this concept so much clearer:
You can see there are endless ways to look strong in a woman's eyes (without actually having muscles) and when done right, setting your life up so she can connect with means...
YOU WILL BE CREATING THE RIGHT KIND OF ATTRACTION.
So she says she wants a strong guy. What do you think is going to work better for you?
Going to the gym and becoming a huge dude with bulging muscles just to match what she says she prefers... OR...
Just BEING a man of conviction and strength beyond the physical?
Try it for yourself now.
Here are 3 more traits:
Within each one, find the preference, locate the desire, write down who you as a guy can easily have a woman connect that desire with you in a way which naturally happens in your life.
That's the formula and IT WORKS.
This is exactly how to understand women and how average or not, ANY guy can begin to unravel the secret mysteries behind any woman.
The average man can understand women!
UPDATE: Just finished this write up you must read about understanding What a Woman Wants and What You must give her:
Related posts to help you understand what women really want: