What do you think of when you hear the word “flirting”? Be honest.
For years (make that decades) I used to equate the concept of flirting with making the kind of remarks and/or gestures toward women that would get you slapped for your efforts.
Images of construction workers whistling at female passers-by. Unsolicited whacks on the tail. Lines like “Hey baby, nice shoes…”
Know what I mean?
Basically, being called a “flirt” was never something positive back when I was in school. At least, I didn’t THINK it was.
Except that in retrospect, all the guys the girls would call a “flirt” in an irritated and/or shocked tone of voice also seemed to be the ones who got the dates.
Was it that maybe the girls actually LIKED being flirted with, and that my own misinformation about all “male behavior” equating to “bad behavior” had clouded my logic?
Nah… couldn’t have been.
Flirting had to have been a bad idea if you wanted to be a “nice guy“.
At least that’s what I used to think.
But nowadays my perspective is different.
It all started when I began to figure out that women talk about flirting A LOT. In fact, women’s dating advice is practically obsessed with it.
Considering women talk about it so much, I realized that it can’t be automatically a “negative” in their mindset.
The truth is that women, like men, want to know HOW to flirt…and they want to know WHEN to flirt.
Moreover, they want to know how to respond POSITIVELY to MEN who are flirting with THEM.
You mean the answer isn’t as easy as “slap their grill silly, stomp away angrily and call security?”
Apparently not. That wouldn’t require so much writing on the subject.
So here’s the deal. If women WANT to be flirted with, then the REAL DEFINITION of what “flirting” is must somehow be different than “unsolicited, unwanted sexual advances”.
And it is.
The real definition of “flirting” is not only VERY different than that, it’s also DISARMINGLY SIMPLE.
“Flirting” is simply ANY INTERACTION of ANY KIND with MOTOS (members of the opposite sex) that would flat-out feel WRONG were it directed to someone of the same gender.
Granted, I’m assuming “heterocentrism” here…but I trust you get my point.
It’s not necessarily overtly SEXUAL communication.
It’s simply DIFFERENT.
If you see a woman coming the other way and smile at her, you probably wouldn’t have smiled that way at another guy.
We all know that if you lock eyes with a man and hold the gaze, it signals potential hostility. So you’d probably avoid that scenario.
But if you lock eyes with a woman and hold it, that’s DIFFERENT.
If you’re checking in at the airline counter and the woman asks for your ID, you might joke with her that she’s probably wondering if she’s old enough to hang with you. Innocent enough…but not exactly what you’d say were it a guy behind the counter. Right?
If you’re shopping for clothes and ask a particularly hot woman who works there to recommend some stylish threads to “make you look good“, and she obliges, my guess is that you’ll interact with her along the way a bit differently than you would were some dude helping you.
In fact, you’d probably tell the guy who works there that you were “just looking” and take your chances on your own.
Because that’s DIFFERENT. It’s just not the SAME when someone of the same gender helps you with stuff like that.
I think too many of us as guys are too uptight about, if not downright SCARED OF flirting because we treat it as a “black and white” issue.
What if you started looking at the “grey area“?
What if you made a habit of realizing that simple banter with women doesn’t have to be “sexually charged” in order to be flirting?
Could you potentially see how by doing so you can quickly and easily set yourself apart as a MAN rather than some “neuter creature“…all the while without being creepy, sleazy or pushy?
What if you began to FREE YOURSELF to interact with women in a way that’s DIFFERENT than how you interact with other guys?
And here is the wild part: I bet you ALREADY DO EXACTLY THAT. Every day. Probably without even realizing it.
Every day, 95% or more of us as guys are on auto-pilot as far as interacting with women “differently” goes.
In other words, it’s likely that you already have MORE PRACTICE and are probably BETTER AT flirting than you guess.
Now, don’t get me wrong. If you are one of the 5% out there who absolutely, positively and robotically responds to any human being drawing breath in the same manner all the time, you probably need to loosen up. In fact, call me IMMEDIATELY and let’s get that handled.
But see, my guess is that 80% of you guys reading this are thinking you must be part of that 5%. And you probably are not.
Test me here. The next time you leave the house, pay careful attention to how you interact with men compared to how you interact with women. My educated guess is that you’ll note clear differences that you may have not even noticed before.
That’s because you’re a FLIRT. And you’re hard-wired to be–practically from birth.
Amazingly, flirting isn’t even limited to hot women you are attracted to, let alone only to women you’ve just met.
Since it’s not sexually charged necessarily, just about anyone or anything female could potentially be responded to “differently“.
And they should be responded to “differently“…even if you’ve known them for fifty years.
It’s all about making women smile. It’s about making them comfortable with you. It’s about giving them the distinct privilege, accompanied by the subtle thrill, of having a MAN in their presence.
Now, with THAT final piece of the puzzle in place, you can now see how “stage 2” flirting-the kind that involves a little more sexual zing-is a natural outflow from this “different” style of communication with women.
But as a man, you can modulate how that goes by LEADING as you interact with women.
For instance, you say something fun and challenging to brighten her day. How does she respond?
If she responds in a manner that is decidedly DIFFERENT than how she might respond to some other lady, then you’ve got a willing accomplice.
If she’s stone cold and about as neuter as a Styrofoam cup…well, maybe not.
But if she responds powerfully to your leadership in the conversation, you can then train yourself to recognize that as potential interest of the decidedly NON-neuter kind.
At that point, get her number. Make plans to see her again. DO SOMETHING rather than leave her hanging. Because if you do not do something, you’ll disappoint her.
Oh…and by the way…in case you haven’t figured it out yet, all of this logic works in REVERSE.
Have you been sitting around lately complaining that women should “show more interest” in guys and/or “make it easier” for you to approach them?
From now on, you know that if a woman is interacting with you in ANY WAY that’s DIFFERENT from how she would typically deal with another woman, then you’ve got all the info you need.
After all, she probably won’t whistle like a construction worker, grab your crotch or use some line on you. At least probably not.
So with that in mind, give all that I’ve shared with you a try. I promise you’ll be blown away.
Share It Because You Know Another Guy Who Needs To Read It Too!
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When you click that link above, you’ll be instantly introduced to some of the most radical ideas you’ve seen in the world of men’s dating science in a LONG time… but they’re PURE GENIUS, without a doubt.
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Yes, this is THAT powerful, so be sure to check it out.
FULFILL HER WILDEST FANTASIES… AND YOURS!
It’s by far the most tragic irony when it comes to our sex lives as men.
We fantasize our brains out about women, getting them naked and having a wild, riotous, blackout-inducing tryst with them.
In our minds, that would be about the greatest, most shining moment imaginable… almost too good to be true.
But what happens when we actually find ourselves in the moment, FINALLY able to act out that fantasy with the excited, giggling “sex kitten” who’s already peeling off her lingerie before our very eyes?
All most guys can think about is not blowing their top too fast, if they can manage to “perform” at all.
They worry about what to do.
They worry about whether or not they’ll be able to satisfy her.
And then their brains wander to even darker, more unpleasant and totally unexpected places.
You got it:
For most guys, all the FUN gets sapped out of a situation that was supposed to be nothing short of glorious.
But there’s a powerful secret that turns the tables on this tragic mess forever.
From this day forward, imagine mesmerizing the sexiest woman you’ve ever met with pure masculine confidence and sexual bravado in the bedroom.
No more misfires, no more “failure to deploy”, and certainly no more bitter disappointments.
Imagine giving her what she craves so magnificently that she’s calling you midday begging to come over on her lunch break.
Isn’t it time to make your fantasies become REALITY? Here’s how:
HOW DO YOU TALK TO WOMEN WITHOUT GETTING SHAMED OR ARRESTED NOWADAYS?
Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock, you’ve been shocked and amazed by how brazen the anti-male movement has gotten.
The #MeToo hashtag is purposefully vague so as to shame practically any male for virtually any “offense”, all the while cheapening actual sexual assault and fostering a victim mentality among more women than ever.
And the pace at which the rich and famous are being called out, shamed and being ruined for sexual offenses–sometimes without any hard evidence, let alone due process–is enough to cause any man to run for his life.
But see, the truth is you’re NOT one of those guys.
You’re not a monster simply because you’re male and heterosexual.
And just because so many are being hit with allegations doesn’t mean you’re next to be accused.
Meanwhile, the vast majority of women are still 100% female and heterosexual. They never wanted it to come to this either.
Bold, confident masculinity is what turns on feminine sexual urges.
Sex is the most powerful force in the universe, and—news flash—politics can’t stop it and more than you and I could stop a freight train.
Remember, without you women are left unsatisfied…AND the human race would be extinct in 100 years.
So how do you wrap your head around this?
How do you attract women and interact with them without ever having to worry about them blowing the “sexual harassment” whistle on you?
How can you–even as a regular, decent guy–expect to initiate physical, sexual contact without having the “rape police” called on you?
These are the questions men ask my friend and long-time dating coach Scot McKay every day.
Hell, even WOMEN are writing him asking why men don’t even LOOK at them anymore, let alone talk to them or ask them out.
Obviously, it’s all spiraling out of control at breakneck speed.
Just yesterday I read an article about how male managers aren’t even hiring women anymore, and male employees are practically begging their bosses not to be put in the “socially perilous” position of working with women.
It’s gotten to where nearly ALL of us see virtually ANY interaction with ANY woman as a surefire way to have our reputations, careers and even our very freedom itself brought to ruins…again, all without due process.
So WHAT ARE WE TO DO? I mean…should we drown in porn and die alone?
Hell no. There are rational, objective answers…and they make perfect sense when you know the truth:
These 33 rules, when followed & used can get you there. Here's how you can attract women through personal development. Get proven results, date lots of girls of your choice, & become a great man any woman would want to go out with anytime. All secrets revealed.
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