We’re still in the stage of “distraction” and there’s no better way to distract you from the one girl you’re stuck in the friends zone with ( or more precisely ALL the women who put you in the friends zone than by becoming socially proofed.
You need to get, maintain, and keep high status because lots of guys who struggle with women find they have little or not status.
First the sort-of scientific explanation:
Social proof, also known as informational social influence, is a psychological phenomenon where people assume the actions of others reflect correct behavior for a given situation. This effect is prominent in ambiguous social situations where people are unable to determine the appropriate mode of behavior, and is driven by the assumption that surrounding people possess more knowledge about the situation.
This means when you have high status others will follow YOUR MOVE.
You become the one standing out in a crowd.
All this works amazingly well so please do NOT skip this important step.
When you’re seen with attractive women you will become automatically “socially proofed” and others will give you higher attractive status.
If you “act” correctly around them ( by not showing it off or giving away too much non-essential information ) others will make assumptions about you.
Some of those assumptions might be wrong but who cares because most of the assumptions will actually help you eliminate the friends zone.
Whole successful business models have been made through this concept of social proofing up to AND including the dating scene. Take a look around on how commercials works and product selling testimonials hype something up and you’ll see exactly what I mean.
For a taste of how beautiful women can help you eliminate the friends zone just take a look at how successful these girls have become by helping guys just like YOU: The Wing Girl Method or better yet get the entire system of your choice: InsideHER 4 Week System Trust me it’s worth every bit of it.
When a girl you’re ONLY friends with ( or other women you don’t know but begin to recognize you ) begin to see more women entering your social life you can drive her competitive urges to actually to compete for you.
It will literally drive her attraction towards you up. If again, the rules are followed.
When you’re able to function exceptionally well socially that is you’ll have comfortable places to go where people know and respect your status and proof you even more.
The entire concept is to start and maintain building a life OUTSIDE of women so your life does not revolve around them.
As always these steps are very similar to getting a girlfriend so I suggest you go through these two steps:
Building this social proof and higher status can become a direct path out of the friends zone alone.
You’re allowing her or women to begin feel something for you beside friendship.
One woman may begin to feel like she missed something with you. She will begin to feel you might be a choice she never thought about before.
This technique was always obvious to me but it was also the second toughest obstacle holding me back.
The first was my fear of intimacy. I didn’t want to ruin the friendship combined with my lack of experience and confidence in getting physical early on.
“Social Proof” is NOT to be taken lightly.
Women are highly sociable. Some women can not function happily without a valid social life.
And even more important …
Women will never allow a friendship to be destroyed over someone who does not know how to maintain an exceptional social life.
This is a hard thing for most men to admit. It feels like we’re being manipulated by women. You think,
“So a woman will turn me down or put me in the friend’s zone based on my social life – despite the fact I’m a really cool guy to hang out with? ”
Yes they will… But this does NOT mean a woman will refuse you based on how great your social life is because your “social proof” IS your ability to keep up a social life outside of her.
My life in the friends zone almost always had me suddenly building my social life around the one I wanted and that just put me deeper in it.
Too many men like I did object to many parts of social proofing. They refuse to change. They might find it morally unacceptable.
They believe it’s changing themselves too much or breaking their daily habits which feel comfortable.
Perhaps you’re struggling with social awkwardness which is totally understandable. If that’s the case read this, Is Social Awkwardness Holding You Back? Connection and Friendship because it contains the four steps of friendship and connection which might help you.
Despite ALL your objections you must begin to become friends with MORE women you find attractive.
It feels counter-intuitive but there’s a purpose behind all this which is even more than we’ve already covered today.
Women you find attractive must become just another part of your life. You’re ( in a way ) numbing yourself around attractive women.
You’re learning how to deal with having attractive friends you don’t or won’t sleep with in a different way without the “friends zone haze.”
You’re learning the social complexity which attractive women “feel” they have to deal with.
You’re learning how they think.
What they’re thinking about.
Why they “feel” they do things.
What attracts them.
I’m assuming the girls you want for more than a friendship are the hottest ones around but even if she’s not, it’s good to make sure her “competition” is better looking than her.
WARNING: Do not become their girlfriends. Keep your masculinity. Never try to prove you’re a man… just BE a guy.
Let’s deal with any more objections you might have on being socially proofed today.
“I don’t have any other girlfriends.”
I have yet to meet many women who will date a man who is not at least close friends with other women.
Stop seeing her privately. Make some NEW women friends which hopefully are attracted to you but you would probably never date. Start inviting many of them out.
“My social life is boring and/or I have no social life.”
Find something new and cool you are passionate about and start doing it. Don’t go overboard. Narrow your list to only things you like doing for yourself but also something a woman might enjoy doing with you.
If you don’t have the time do not be afraid to take the time you would normally spend with the woman you’re trying to get out of the friends zone with and use it for yourself. You’ll only make things better.
After you’ve done this a few times tell her about what’s happening in your life but do not invite her just yet.
Mention it casually with a fun story about what happened that evening.
Avoid making statements which imply explicit details.
You were not with “some hot girl” you were out with a friend. In other words avoid giving away information which makes it seem like you’re trying to make her jealous or you’re trying to show off.
In case you’re wondering I grew up playing pool and loved it. It was a long time between games so I introduced that old passion back into my life.
I also started traveling more.
Taking more road trips.
Going to casino’s with friends.
Baseball games, concerts, etc…
“This feels manipulative.” –
Truth of the matter is, developing a fun social lifestyle you enjoy doing is called living your life the way YOU want in a way which does NOT directly revolve around woman.
If you’re not doing things you enjoy then you’re doing something wrong so find something else.
Women obviously do not want to be manipulated but they do want a man who knows how to have fun. Especially if it means he’s comfortable enough hanging out with women who are like her and feel attracted to him.
When a woman realizes you have choices and you choose to not let looks alone dictate who you date, you take on a whole new perspective in her life.
This is the EXACT solution I used with of course some great advice.
I found women who were close to what I was looking for in a woman but for one reason or another we could never date then I started hanging around with them more often.
Some were in a relationship. Some had too many flaws. Some were only great personalities but I wasn’t physically attracted to them. Some were even married.
It really doesn’t matter why you wouldn’t ever date them.
What’s important is to increase your status, learn objectively about attractive women, and to make sure you’re getting a pre-proofed social life women will WANT to be a part of.
Social proofing is part of step 1 or the distraction phase.
We’re distracting you and attempting to remove the habits you’ve developed around women you want which are putting you in the friends zone.
You’ve learned to look at this problem objectively. To see the truth behind it all and hopefully rationalized out ALL your excuses.
You’ve learned about your limited beliefs and how they’re holding you back.
Today we covered your social life and hopefully I’ve given you some tools to work with and the important reasons why changing your social life, getting and maintaining higher status, and becoming pre-proofed lead directly OUT of the friends zone with one or more women you know or are going to meet.
It’s understandable that changing your social life may be tough especially if you’re shy or haven’t fully experienced your local area but it’s all good because there’s a ton of help out there to further the learning process. For those of you who are shy read this… The Power of Social Skills and understand social games are a normal part of everyone’s life so why not gain the edge you need. I would also suggest you learn to turn heads whenever you walk into a room because you can become automatically pre-proofed when you know How To Own The Room. Here at DiaLteG TM I’ve also set up a page to get you OUT and meeting people on this page: 32 Great Places to Take A Date or Meet People.