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Can A Woman Change Your Mind Or Make You Like Her?

in For Women, Friends Zone, Opinions Advice
Woman Change His Mind Heart

There seems to be a common belief out there among guys who have been “friend zoned” by a woman that they think or believe they can change the her mind into liking them.

BUT…. you rarely ever hear the other side of the story.

Can a woman change a guy’s mind?

Common belief suggests it’s easier for a guy to get a woman to feel something more for him than it is for a guy to feel something for her IF there was nothing there in the beginning.

What do you think? Is it easier for a man or woman?

Before you answer in the comment section you might want to read what’s coming up next because it’s rarely something anyone thinks about BUT it makes a lot of sense.

The not-always-so-obvious problem with questions like this is the one thing we use everyday… our MINDS.

Attraction and love is NOT a CHOICE.

No one chooses to FEEL something – it just happens.

Changing another person’s mind is assuming a man is CHOOSING to not feel something which is far from the way attraction and love works.

David DeAngelo wrote the most powerful and insightful book explaining how attraction really works and PROVED to me how something so simple can be so amazingly RIGHT.

(Pick up the ebook for yourself if you’re a guy of course and if you have any problems with women. ANY problems because this will literally change your entire mindset and open success with women like most men will never ever experience – Attraction Isn’t A Choice.)

The ideas in the book also suggest that once a woman doesn’t FEEL something for a guy – no amount of asking, pleading or begging will change it.

Guy Trying Convince Her Needy Attraction
“You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with “logic and reasoning”.

If a woman doesn’t “feel it” for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being “reasonable” with her?”

Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women – Common Mistakes to Avoid

The same goes for you too.

Guys are NOT “choosing” to not feel something for you therefore changing his mind is not going to work.

In fact – “trying” to change, convince, call it whatever you like, is one of the biggest mistakes a woman can attempt IF she’s to find real love.

MISTAKE #8: Trying To “Convince” Him To Like You Or Love You.

“What do most women do when they meet a man that they REALLY like… but he’s just not that interested or isn’t as serious? They try to “convince” the man to feel differently.

YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A MAN “FEELS” WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!

Never, ever, ever. You cannot convince a man to feel differently about you with “logic and reasoning”.

Think about it.

If a man doesn’t “feel it” for you, how in the world do you expect to change that by being “reasonable” with him?

Men are the worst at this by the way. They’re always complimenting women who don’t like them and buying them gifts.

Women like the behavior sometimes, but it NEVER makes the woman like the man. She might enjoy what she gets out of it, but it doesn’t change the way she FEELS about him.

When a man just isn’t interested, women will try and chase, compliment, convince and do their best to change his mind with logical and rational approaches.”

Avoid These Ten Mistakes With Men To Get The Love Life of Your Dreams

Okay so…

Changing someone’s mind (man or woman) is definitely NOT the answer.

BUT…

Finally! Some good news, right?

Yes.

Assuming it’s not a choice this means you can CREATE something and you’ll be shown the best way for it to happen below… just be patient.

Let’s go back to the original idea of this post and that was to hopefully get “other” guys to tell you the absolute truth about changing how the FEEL about you if nothing was there in the beginning OR if it went away.

Here are 4 scenarios a guy might experience with you followed by a very specific question he could answer.

Scenario 1:

You meet her.

You both go out on a date one or more times.

You realize you’re not feeling it.

Maybe she’s kind of cool and all so you wouldn’t mind hanging out with her so you tell her,

I just want to be friends.

Could she ever “change” your mind?

Scenario 2:

You meet her.

She’s totally into you and you begin to think, “You’re in.

She’s hot, sexy, and does it for you physically.

There’s no doubt in your mind that you want her so the chemistry rises and you end up having sex one or more times.

Then suddenly you begin to feel if you let this go any further you will end up in a relationship with her and that’s not something you sure you want from now OR with HER.

So….

You pull back and stop calling her so much or stop calling her entirely.

You just feel you’re not ready but she continues pushing you causing you to pull back ever further and eventually you’ve have enough so you tell her,

“I like you but I don’t want to hurt you.”

Could she ever change your mind into wanting a relationship with her?

Scenario 3:

You meet her.

You don’t feel physically attracted to her.

She’s seems really into you and keeps pushing you to go out with her or she flirts with you constantly hoping you’ll get the hint.

But you never do for obvious reasons…

Could she ever get you to feel what you were missing when you first met her?

Scenario 4:

You meet her with a friend.

She’s pretty cool and you end up hanging out with her more and doing shit together.

You both quickly realize you have a lot in common. In fact you have so much in common you end up becoming very close friends.

Months or years down the road you have “the talk” because you both have been in and out of so many relationships since you met and it’s driving both of you crazy.

She casually mentions,

Have you ever thought about us going out?” or

“How come we never hooked up?” or

How come you never asked me out on a date?

This surprises you and as you think about her questions you realize she is more like a sister to you so you tell her and she accepts it outwardly…

But inside, deep in her heart, that WAS the VERY moment she realized she had fallen in love with you and now wants more.

Could she ever change your mind about seeing her less as a sister and more as a sexual partner?

T is not a survey. We’re not going to click on some pre-selected box which may or may not be close to what we were or are feeling.

Leave your answers below and let women finally get a glimpse into the mind of “the guy” who either chose to be just friends with her or who was just never feeling it for her.

Now it’s my turn…

“If a guy is not feeling any kind of attraction towards a woman it’s very rare for him to begin to feel it. This includes both types of attraction. Making it incredibly much more difficult for a woman to escape his friends zone.”

Two Big Reasons Why & How You As A Woman, End Up In His Friends Zone

Men generally experience two forms of attraction.

The first is purely physical and is by sight only.

The second happens when a man connects deeply with a woman and a bond is formed which includes love and possibly a relationship.

If the attraction is there and he’s hesitant about entering or committing to you – his mind can DEFINITELY be changed.

But again – like mentioned above – you can NOT convince him of anything.

You can uses certain skills, techniques, or communicate to him differently to urge him to decide he wants a relationship with you.

There are literally thousands of advice and tip articles to help you there and even more paid advice products.

(Tell me a little about your problem below and I’ll do my best to suggest the best for you because I’ve reviewed and advertised hundreds of them over the years.)

Here’s a cool Ebook to help you out if this is the problem:  

10 Reasons Why Men Won’t Commit & What To Do About It.

It’s a free download hosted at another website run by me. You’ll enjoy it because it’s packed with great advice and tips you can use to “encourage” a man to commit to you.

Now…

If there is no initial physical attraction then you’re going to have a much harder problem on your hands because like before – you can’t MAKE him feel physically attracted to you.

It’s not that guys are only into looks – that couldn’t be further from the truth. Despite what most feel – it’s a myth.

Men are definitely not just into how attractive you are…. it just helps to gain his initial interest in wanting to get to know you better.

If you think he was missing the physical attraction part when you first met AND you want to get his attention then this might be your only solution:

Do not see him for at least a few months.

Three to five months may be enough because we all go through stages in our lives that play out over that time.

A lot of time needs to pass BEFORE she could ever be seen any differently.

Develop or change how you appear physically.

It could mean losing weight, changing her hair color, dressing differently, or even just learning how to walk with more sex appeal.

It any case this must be done according to YOUR life and not for him.

You must understand that for him to begin to feel something different for you – this must be done selfishly – for yourself.

It’s hard to create something new with him if you’re only doing for his love and affection.

Just like you – men like a challenge.

If you’re too willing to give up so much of yourself for him, it will destroy the chances of a second stage attraction. (Connection, love, relationship.)

So you can see – you’re not TRYING to change his mind – you’re merely presenting yourself differently to him by triggering his physical attraction towards you.

And you can see the only REAL solution to that is to get far away from him and create a new look for yourself.

Which takes time and patience.

As noted above – men are NOT all into looks BUT if you’re not doing certain things for yourself which can help him feel attracted to you – then that needs to be taken care of…. immediately.

Something noted in this popular article:

#1: Look after yourself.

You may think that this is about being a flawless specimen of beauty or wallowing in vanity.

NOT at all.

What I’m stressing here is that you need to let everyone know you care enough to look your best. And that’s not the same as physical perfection “guys just need to cotton on to the fact that you’re always on top of your looks.”

How To Be The Girl That Guys Want To Date

You can download this Ebook to learn some FACTS about men and their attraction to women: How Men Evaluate Women.

The book brings up a point which is very important to understand IF and WHEN you want to change how a guy FEELS about you.

Remember the two forms of attraction above?

IF a guy isn’t too physically attracted to you at first BUT becomes more emotionally connected to you and bonds with you (intimately and sexually) you WILL become more physically attracted to you.

Likewise – your PERSONALITY – regardless of your overall look CAN AND WILL MAKE YOU APPEAR MORE PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE.

This is good news because it gives you just as much opportunity as he does in making you FEEL something even though nothing was there in the beginning.

Does it fully answer the BIG question today?

Can you CHANGE a guy’s mind into “liking” you if any of those scenarios have happened to you or you’re going through something “different”?

NOPE!

Why?

Because you must get away from changing his mind.

Remember – you can not convince someone to feel something for you and attraction in all its form is not something which is chosen… it is FELT!

You can not change his mind BUT…

Do the right things and you CAN make him start to FEEL something for you.

If all other things are in place and you learn the right skills to make that happen.

Obviously it’s not guaranteed to work on 100% of all guys in every situation but it can and does happen.

Just like you might not have felt something for a guy you knew and then months or years down the road he started to feel it – the same goes for him.

Lots of guys have personally wrote to me to tell me that they didn’t experience anything more than a friendship with a woman and slowly, over time BEGAN to have real deep feelings for her.

It’s TOTALLY possible so it can be work.

In all the scenarios above you can get him to “feel” something different BUT it does require some work and since this about people, there’s never a guarantee it will work.

You might end up wasting a lot of  your valuable time with nothing to show for it and each situation requires a different technique or skill or communication style.

Thanks for stopping by today and I do hope you’ve learned something about men you can use.

Remember this WAS written for guys to leave their opinion and if that’s you AND you have a story, comment, or opinion on if a woman can change your mind – please share it below.

Since the transition to making DiaLteG TM just for men I strongly encourage and suggest you take a good look at my “only for women” – “all about guys” website appropriately named  Why Do Guys…?Why Do Guys Header

You’ll find lots of great stuff on understanding men there.

Your second choice and a great opportunity would be to look at the articles at the approach I’ve written for women. The Approach – For Women Category.

About the author: Creator of the nice guy approach, why do guys, why do chics, and DiaLteG TM. Transformed from a nice guy kiss ass who wanted women to like me for “who I was” to an attractive “good guy” who knows what it takes to create attraction and succeed with women, dating, and relationships.

Please LIKE or SHARE my Facebook fan pages: Why Do Chics…? | DiaLteG TM OR JOIN the best group on women at Why Do Chics…?. Find and follow me on Twitter – Peter White.

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79 comments… add one
  • Michelle

    There is a guy friend who I had a major crush on years ago but he was in a relationship and moved away, and I let it go and moved on! Recently he has reappeared in my life, seperated for over 6 months and we have been spending alot of time together. He said early on that he viewed me as a sister/close friend. Its very complicated! Our friendship has became very close again and we spend all weekend together with his kids and mine doing family activities. I did not mean to but I think I have fallen for him. I am emotionally attached and “all in”. The signals are mixed and their are constant sexual inuendos between us. Could he possibly change his mind and be into me? Am I delusional?

    • SOPHIE

      once a guy tells you he only wants to be friends, he will never change his mind. take him at face value, he knows you well enough by now to know if he wants more. some men are lonely and will use your company to fill the void, as soon as someone better comes along, he will throw you away. better cut him loose now. don’t let him have his cake and eat it too. speaking from experience.

    • Michelle,

      Although it’s no guarantee – but once a man is emotionally connected to you, the hard part is done because that’s the part which is more difficult for men to achieve for lots of reasons.

      Therefore – you must add real physical attraction to the mix because without it, he’ll never see you as more than just a sister or close friend.

      Don’t let Sophie or anyone tell you any differently.

      You CAN make a man who feels emotionally connected develop a strong physical attraction for you. It’s not easy but it’s possible.

      The big mistake lots of women make while trying to do that is thinking that it’s all about looks. It’s not, that’s only part of the equation. Your actions – how you communicate those actions – how you challenge him – and more… ALL combine to make a man feel attraction towards you beyond the emotional connection.

      IF you only focus on just the physical stuff like how you look or appeal to his eyes will more than likely cause him to stray later and it’s a big reason why
      Sophie mentioned how a guy leaves when something better (or more attractive) comes along.

      When you give a guy the unbeatable combination of emotional and physical attraction like no other woman can (depending on his character and self-esteem) he’s not going to find another woman who can give him both equally or at greater heights, right?

      The hard part is done – not just start adding the “other” stuff and you’ll greater your chance at getting him.

      Start with reading this and see where it takes you:

      Desire Principles: 6 Tricks Women That Women Use To Make Men Crazy About Them
      https://www.dialteg.org/visit/Desire-Principles.pdf

      Increase his desire for you above and beyond his physical eyes. Get both of them covered.

      You already have the emotional connection, probably a little physical attraction, NEXT you need to add DESIRE and use every available skill at your disposal to make that happen.

      Wishing you all the best and please – make sure you use those tactics – and make sure he feels he has to work for you.

      Pete

  • Ashley

    I’m curious about your scenario 2, as it’s something I’ve recently experienced. How does a girl turn that situation around? We had a pretty intense and great connection and dated about six weeks. We did seem to be on different pages about each other – as he asked for FWB and I am interested in a more exclusive relationship. I turned down the FWB offer (and subsequent ‘just friends’ offer) and so we are no longer talking, but I want to know what the odds are that he’ll change his mind.

    • Based on what you wrote me I’d say the odds are good. Too many women settle for the FBW thing (and the friends thing when we know it’s usually just the guy “hoping” he’ll get the benefits anyway).

      This will give him time to revert back to courting or working for you. As time passes there’s a good chance he will want what you had before. Unfortunately, I believe the same thing will happen. He’ll want the quick fun chemistry thinking it’s something else and repeat the “pull back” when it becomes something more real.

      So, good odds Ashley, but maybe not so good odds he will want something different the second time around.

      Pete

  • Danika Aquash

    I’ve known this guy for 6 years, the first year he invited me to his friends, family reunion. Dropped me as soon as he found someone else. Then he moved out of the country, came back we reconnected for FWB he stopped bc he found someone to be with as I did to. Reconnected for FWB again after our break ups. After awhile he tried to end it & tell me sorry if feelings were hurt. I texted him out of the blue 2 weeks later and the 2 weeks turned into now seeing each other for 3 months things started to get serious, we started to see each other more often, one time he didn’t wanna have sex he just wanted to cuddle & sleep. One night he came out and asked to be with me & told me he thinks he’s falling in love with me. I said yes & the next day he changed his mind. I don’t know what to do?! I fell for him & showed myself & was “all in” he said that he’s lost & we can still be friends. He added that he caught feelings when he tried to end it but I came back and he didn’t know what to do.

    • Peter White

      Here’s what you should do – FORGET ABOUT HIM! Replace him with someone else. I don’t like to be so black & white like this but he obviously is not ready for any relationship of any kind. He’s all over the place which tells me he might not EVER be READY for any relationship (long-term) and until that time – you will only get more of the same stuff.

      Some guys will NEVER be at that point and there’s nothing you can or should do about it. Sure you can tips the scales your way but why bother when there actually are lots of guys who are relationship material and ready for a real commitment.

      Pete

  • Sara

    Ive known this guy for 10 years. We met at my first actual job at the age of 20. There was instant attraction. Eventually he said he wanted to date me. One night I was at his place and I wanted to hook up and he said I think we should wait. We eventually did it a few times. It never became a relationship. I stopped working there We stayed in contact and hooked up a few times over the years and even just hung out without sex. I really liked him but did not want to fall back into it. He would always contact me. I got over him but he kept coming back. He has had a couple of gfs. I’ve known only cause of facebook. He never contacted me while he had a gf. One of these times he did tell me he wanted to take me on a date. I wasnt into him anymore so I didnt. He did ask me to go out and do things with him or see his band play. I never did. In the past yr and a half he came back into my life and I did not have feelings for him but they somehow developed. We didnt see eachother for a couple of months but then for the past year ive seen him often almost every week or every other week up to now. We have amazing chemistry in and out of the bedroom. We have so much in common and theres never a dull moment. He just told me I’m a great friend and Im cool and sexy and hot and he doesnt want things to get serious and he doesnt want a relationship now. But still wants to hang. He is focused on making money and working. He works a lot. I told him I was fine with it and eventually I will get bored and move on. Though deep down I really want to be with him. Our “relationship” is great. I don’t understand. I know that I will no longer be contacting him and I am not going to wait around. He never mentions past relationships or other women, does seem to have mommy issues though.Do you think he will ever come around? I would love your input. I really thought he might actually love me.

    • Hey Sara. I don’t think he will ever come around. He’s getting everything he needs from this “relationship” and it doesn’t appear he wants something more.

      If a guy keeps showing up but is saying “you’re cool and all, perfect, sexy, BUT I don’t want to get serious with you and definitely don’t want a relationship” it means he’s not “feeling” it for you in a way which I’d be willing to commit.

      He has a ton of excuses as to why it’s not happening which despite his “mother issues. Remember he’s had several girlfriends in the past. He was willing to risk it for them but not you because of what, “he’s now focused on his career?”

      Men (even those who are not capable of commitment) will almost always take ACTION when a woman makes him feel that she’s the one for him. That action may not always make sense or it might be disastrous or whatever, but not many men can resist some sort of relationship when he’s really feeling it.

      I know, not the best news but good to hear, right?

      Hoped it helped Sara and the best of luck,

      Pete

  • Sara

    Hes also told me I’m perfect a couple of times. sorry forgot to mention it.

  • Carrie d

    I dated a guy for a few weeks . Their was lots of chemistry , we were both into eachother sleeping together but I have just recently separated from a 5 year relationship . I found he got a little distant with me and I became insecure and asked him questions about he’s x and about how he felt . He said he thought we were on 2 different pages and he couldn’t deal with my insecurities and he dropped it . I fell for him so quick it hurt and I didn’t want to let it go so I messaged him a lot . He tells me to move on he’s done and this isn’t what he wants . Will he come around if I give him space ?

    • Peter White

      The hard answer Carrie is how YOU feel, what you see, where YOU think you are – NOT him.

      How’s your self-esteem? How much do you value yourself? Where do you feel you are in life?

      Those are the questions you should be asking BEFORE you ever let a guy tell you that you’re insecure. (Whether he’s right or wrong makes no difference.) Who cares what HE thinks… what do YOU think.

      If by chance you don’t feel “good” enough or you feel that you need to work on those things – do it. Start over. Build some confidence and some esteem and NEVER go back to a guy who tells you that you’re not good enough for him.

      Sure maybe you pushed him away. You just got out of a I’m assuming failed relationship of 5 years. Of course you’re not going to feel that healthy for a while. It’s expected for you to be a little weary about the doing it again. It’s perfectly natural BUT WHY would you do all this work for a guy who says you’re not good enough and calls you insecure without offering any real support over it.

      Find yourself. Find out who you are. Ditch ANY man who makes you feel bad for being who you are at any current place you are. GIVE to YOURSELF and don’t let anyone take away something from you.

      Read this and take away the parts which you feel is closely related to your situation and the place you’re at now.

      Do You Only Attract Loser Men? Here’s Why & How You Can Stop It Now
      https://www.dialteg.com/do-you-only-attract-loser-men/

      If you want to start new and fresh and build yourself into the woman I know you have inside – go through the steps here and ENJOY. You’ll never again let a man TELL you who are again.

      http://link.dialteg.com/Believe-Love-Steps

      All the best – I think if you head in the right direction you’re going to be the best you can ever be because it’s ALL within YOUR control.

      Pete

  • Eva

    Well there is this guy with whom i came close the past 6 months. We both studed at the same city but at the end of may he would move back to his family’s city. About two months before he leaves he reveals his crush for me and we started dating. But i was in a state of mind thinking of the long distance we would both have and i ended us. He was very disappointed in me. But i soon after asked him for a second chance which he gave but in a reluctant mood. I was feeling so bad because i was so wrong and judged to fast. I acted crazy which didn’t suit me at all. Anyway we started dating again but the day of his returned was getting close and i felt like he was very anxcious and scared about the responsibilities of his return and our hanging relationship so he asked me to stop what we where having. He called me later that day asking if i was mad at him and why i wasn’t answering his texts. I asked him to stop because i needed time for myself.
    I really really really want this guy in my life with all his flaws but i don’t know how to earn him back for good. We will be in the same city for summer holidays. Any suggestions?

  • María camelo

    I know him for half a year, we started as classmates, then friends, while this his friends always use to tease him around me “trying” to make him make a move, later we started to text and talk everyday

    • María camelo

      I know him for half a year, we started as classmates, then friends, while this his friends always use to tease him around me “trying” to make him make a move, later we started to text and talk everyday about everything, I always felt there was chemistry and sexual tension between us, we even shared very intimate information

  • Sophie

    Hello there,

    there was a guy that had a serious crush on me (like 2 years i think…), and i knew that because one of my friends said it to me. I was recently out of a bad ‘relationship’ with a guy that broked my heart a couple of times. In the same time phrase I dated that guy that had a serious crush on me. We went on 4 dates, and the dates were very nice! He had respect for me, he opened for me but I was still broken over this other guy so I didn’t opened to him. He tried too had sex with me two times, but I said no and he was just fine. So after those 4 dates I messaged him what his intensions are, and his answer was that he thinks I’m a nice girl and we get along with eachother, but he didn’t feel the ‘spark’ or whatever for being more then just friends, and he never will feel that way. It was very hard, because I was heartbroken before plus now this guy that had a thing for me wasn’t interested anymore. So I gave it one month en I texted him for a converstation between two friends for not making things awkward in the future. And he said ‘okay’. He gave me some dates, and we never met. because he was sick or whatever… Now two months after that I messaged him for refreshing that last date. So he came to me, we watched a movie (like always), and it was fun and we had sex… After the sex we watched a docu and then he left because he wanted too sleep in his bed and in the early morning he needed too go to the IKEA with his mother and father. After that I hadn’t had one message from him. I saw him like 3 times in that same week in some cafés, and we ignored eachother, so it was really awkward. Then a week later I’ve messaged him a very long text with everything that I needed too say before ( like I didn’t opened because I was hurt and scared, end that I want to be cool around him…). It was a very long message, but I’m cool right now. He messaged that he understands, and there will ‘never’ really come something out of us. I’m cool about it but you know I really hope in a couple of months or years he thinks differently. Because he’s a good guy, with brains and he had only 1 relationship, he is like 5 years single ( just like me). What can I do about this situation? Act normal, friendly? Or nothing? Or maybe become closer friends without really go after something more?

    Sophie.S

  • Annon

    I’ve been with a guy for 5 month. We started having sex about one month into knowing each other. Sex was great and intense! We’re both in fit conditions, we both treat each other really amazingly. We used to go on dates alone together and it’s always nice and great. But lately we’ve only been hanging out with his guy friends. No longer just the two of us. In fact he often chooses them over me. At first I was supportive, telling him to have fun. But then I get fed up and tell him I don’t feel appreciated. And I’d say, I almost immediately tell him I’d want to break up if he doesn’t care. Just to see his reaction. This happened three times. Every time he’s super willing to break up, but two days later he comes back and we mend things up. This time was the third time, and he confessed, he really likes me as a person, and loves sex with me. But finds it hard to fall in love with me, especially that him and I are of different religions. (That was the reason for our first break up, but then we talked it through and made mends). But it came back up. I think the problem is his friends group, they’re all 30 and single and living like they’re in their 20’s Bro life, and the religious difference obviously makes it hard to get over it. I’ve accepted I’m not the girl to make him get out of that, simply because he doesn’t want it. But it kind of sucks because I really enjoyed our time together and we got along quite nice. Could have seen a future but there’s no point now

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