Did you know for years I would go to bed every night with a sick feeling of loneliness inside me?
All I ever really wanted was someone, a woman, a girl, to be by my side when I woke up in the morning.
I would get so angry thinking about it I did not sleep well through my entire twenties. My thoughts ran from sadness, to despair, to anger, and then back again. Repeating itself time and time again.
The sadness came from the feeling I felt destined to be alone for the rest of my life.
“One time it took me ten years to make a few minor changes just to get my “nice head” out of my “bitter ass.” Why You’re Strong Enough to be Single But Can Not Find A Girlfriend
The disparity came from the feeling that there was nothing I could ever do about it.
The anger came from knowing there were “douchebags”, as I called them, who would treat women like shit and still got laid more than I ever did. I never understood why a woman would rather screw some guy who made her feel like shit (most of the time) rather than be with me… a “real” genuine man who only wanted to give women a happiness I felt they deserved.
And oddly enough as it sounds, I never understood how guys could settle for women I did NOT find attractive myself.
Suffice to say,
I thought I wanted a girlfriend so bad it literally drove me crazy!
“How come you never hear a guy say, “I haven’t jerked off in five days. Woo hoo!” or “I haven’t had a girlfriend in ten years! YES!.” How Long Has It Been Since You’ve Had A Girlfriend?
But guess what?
The truth was…
I did not want it bad enough.
Sulking like some lost kid late at night and looking down at women during the day proved it to me.
Look around you and notice the people who have succeeded in their lives through many hardships some of us will NEVER experience, and ask yourself this,
“How bad did they want what they got and what did they actually have to go through to get it?”
For example, A man once “ran” across Canada with no legs. A man once pitched in the major leagues with one hand.
Those men, and many more like them, overcame extreme obstacles to meet their goals. I’ll skip the extreme list to get to a point.
You’re here today, right? Hopefully you are only looking to get a girlfriend and not change the world or perform some daredevil impossible feat of strength.
You’re here to find someone to share your life with you.
Someone who will be affectionate.
A woman to enjoy great sex with and to wake up in each others arms in the morning.
And who knows, maybe a future wife too if you’re lucky enough.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting all that and there’s nothing unusual or wrong thinking you CAN have it all.
BUT, what I’ve learned is this…
If you think you want something bad enough and you’re not getting it, especially when it comes to just finding a girlfriend, then trust me, you do NOT WANT IT BAD ENOUGH!
“The Genius Failure Paradox” is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating. The Ten Reasons Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women
In fact I’m going to suggest you actually have a deep hidden fear of finding her or getting it.
Maybe you’re afraid to get her, you have to become someone you don’t want to be. Changing yourself to meet the so-called standards you think women want or are looking for might go against everything you’re “trying” to live up to.
You fear thinking your lack of experience will leave her unfulfilled in bed or in any form of intimacy. This absence of experience leaves you in a constant circle or never-ending loop because without the experience or opportunity how are you supposed to learn, right?
It’s a lot like trying to learn how to drive a car without a car to practice with and your test is three days away.
AND most of all…
You fear failure like it’s some knock on your masculinity. The more you fail the less of a man you feel, and the less of a man you become decreases the chances of finding a girlfriend. Yet another unending loop filled with despair.
I know… because I’ve been there.
I was comfortable knowing I could bitch about life and how it handed me nothing, while and because all the jerks and assholes get everything I wanted.
However what wasn’t comfortable was this secret I buried inside… something I knew all along…
Passive failing or refusing to DO something real or active is NOT really failing at all and therefore I could never really learn anything new.
We only learn and grow our confidence from true failures and rejections.
In other words…
We learn NOTHING by doing NOTHING.
Hence the fear of failure and being comfortable in our own state of mind becomes so much easier to cope with everyday we tend to say there, wallowing in our seemingly intelligent self-pity.
So a smart man contemplates falsely,
“What if I DO try and still fail? That means I was right all along. I AM a loser with women. I AM destined to be alone. I am not meant for happiness. I know! I’m a smart man and I figured it out long ago. Why should I have to prove “that” to myself? If I do learn that I was right it will hurt much worse that just telling myself I can not attract women because I’m not a jerk. Or I’m too picky. Or too selective.”
Okay… You’ve made it this far in my post. You’re still reading. 🙂
You MUST want to know if either there ARE people out there like you, and/or you want to know if just wanting a woman bad enough, will finally get you to DO something about it.
Or maybe you are finally ready to DO something about it and you don’t if anyone knows it or finds out.
Well, Yes, I guarantee there are lots of men who are in the very same place you are and that only a very small percentage of them will ever do anything about it.
I’m not saying they will live a lonely existence. Who knows. Maybe they will get lucky. Maybe they won’t. Maybe you’ll “get” lucky, maybe you won’t.
“Doesn’t it seem like you’re screwed either way and not in the good getting laid sense?” Are You A Nice Guy Who Is Afraid to Admit You Want A Hot Girlfriend?
As for “wanting” IT bad enough, if you do nothing about it today, I don’t think you want it bad enough just as I’m saying THEY don’t want it bad enough.
I’m being upfront with you because I wish some dude would have slapped ME in the face and taught me what I now know now about attracting women. I only had my Brother waving his hot “chics” in my face (being the dickhead he was) making it much worse as I only learned how to play the blame game.
Hopefully you WILL do something about it and that “something” will start today.
Here are my FREE 11 Steps to Getting A Girlfriend. It’s not the complete answer but it’s more than a great start. No sign ups or crazy videos to watch either.
Of course I want to hear it from you. Your ideas. Your concepts. Your beliefs…