The rule had a purpose which seemed legitimate. It was meant to make a guy look cool, like he had a life or they’re “so busy”, and for certain guys it was important because right after they got a girl’s number – they’d turn into a needy wuss who acted desperate. They acted from a place of “scarcity” or as if they had no real prospects. They had a strong urge to get her before some other guy came along because they didn’t feel confident in their ability to attract and keep a woman.
However when women figured out it was a game, it stopped working the way it was meant to. If you waited and called, she assumed you were following that stupid dating rule every other guy was doing and if she was only slightly interested in the guy, she wouldn’t even answer the call or text. So it defeated its own purpose.
Here are the REAL solutions:
If you don’t want to appear needy – stop being so needy. Problem solved.
If you don’t want to appear desperate – stop acting so desperate to kiss her ass or get a date. Problem solved.
If you don’t have anything to do (not much of a life) get out and start doing things you love. Problem solved.
Make sure you text her the right thing. Get her to text you back as quickly as you messaged her. “How To Quickly & Easily Make Any Woman Feel Uncontrollable Attraction For You – Using Only Texting…”
Text Her Tonight – 3 Foolproof Messages That Make Her Text You Back.
If you want to look cool – Call her early. Text her quickly.
Just don’t linger and act like you need the attention or how you’re worried she’s going to meet another guy. Don’t send a 100 texts or call her everyday when you haven’t even gone on a date yet.
“If you encountered someone who consistently was asking you questions and pestering you via text message, you’d be less inclined to respond to them.”
You can see from the “obvious” solutions offered that it appears men were looking for the “easy way” into a woman’s pants. How if they just acted like they were a real man, they didn’t actually have to become one.
You’ll find a lot of the bullshit dating rules were invented or written to serve that very purpose. The easy quick method to getting laid without having to do any of the real work involved.
And like any other fad – they quickly fade. They stop working because it’s not real and REAL women figure it out quickly. You can only hide your insecurities for so long before you’re called out on it.
Using the 3 day no contact rule will essentially only prove to a woman – you are insecure and need to follow rules. It’s just how a naturally attractive man with confidence acts.
So how long should you wait then before you contact her? What you get her info what’s the standard wait time which works every time?
Okay – If you’ve been following along – I’m NOT going to give you a rule because there is NO standard procedure.
Which basically means where and when you meet her will generally dictate when you should call or text her.
How you meet also makes a difference. Was it from a friend of a friend, at a club or bar, a coffee shop, a grocery store, etc…
What also determines the time frame to contacting is YOU and YOUR LIFE. How busy you actually are. What your schedule is like. How many things you got going on when you first meet her.
Those things (and more) must be considered before you come to a conclusion on the first contact you make with her.
Generally speaking – if you must know something – get back to her within a reasonable amount of time to let her know you’re not just some flake out farming numbers.
How you’re a real genuine guy. How you enjoyed meeting her and you’re looking forward to setting up a date very soon. If you wait too long, she’ll forget she even gave you her number.
Just don’t let some standard old rule dictate your dating life.
“Throw away all the preconceived notions about what a date is like who picks up who, who pays for it, the end of the night kissing… Anything reasonable goes.”
Do things on your own terms. Women like that shit.
If you’re not a needy desperate guy, call her when you can because she KNOWS you’re not that type of guy. Probably why you got her number in the first place.
If you’re not riddled with insecurities, she will get that from you right away. So calling her early won’t change how she feels about you. It won’t even cross her mind. Just don’t act insecure and you’ll be okay. It won’t ruin your chance with her.
This all seems so basic you might be wondering “What the fuck dude?!” This is not advice. I could’ve figured this out on my own.
Well you’re absolutely right which is a GOOD thing because attraction, attracting a girl, being a more attractive man is not rocket science. The basic rules which apply are very general and they’re really just about being socially aware and not socially awkward or displeasing to others.
The REAL part of attraction is communication and that’s the part where you’ll find it so counter-intuitive you’re more likely to screw it up. That’s the problem lots of guys need help or skills to achieve. Throwing an outdated dating rule your way won’t help you, it can only hurt you.
The REAL harder part of attracting girls is getting a good handle on yourself and working or fixing the areas where you might be failing or lacking in.
Once you’ve done that, it comes down to HOW you communicate yourself to others, not just women. Again, which is a skill too many guys don’t understand because they’re not intuitive and they’re not taught to you by the appropriate people growing up.
If your main focus or current question has anything to do with how long you should wait to text or call a girl after you got her number – you’re either looking for a quick fix which will ultimately fail or not work for you, or you’re new to this stuff so you just need a push in the right direction.
Cool – because that new direction is hopefully here at DiaLteG TM.