How do YOU take it when a woman says something about you?
Do you take it personal?
Do you act like you’re okay with it but inside it’s as if she tore your self-esteem a new ass?
Do you fight her back and defend yourself?
Do you laugh it off and throw in a little self-deprecating humor at yourself? Making sure she knows you understand it’s ALL in good fun.
What about when she does it because she’s too drunk to realize you might have heard her.
Here’s what happened recently…
We pulled up to “IHop” late Saturday night and wouldn’t you know it – we ran into a bunch of drunk people. One stumbled over to us saying how much she loved the color of our car,
“I love the color silver. It’s a nice color. I want a silver car…”
You can tell she was not much of a drunk conversationalist but I will admit, in the moment and all random like it was pretty funny. I can only imagine some of the shit that came out of my mouth during my past drunken moments.
They, ( she was with 4 guys and 3 girls ) headed in to what I imagine was going to be a very loud late night breakfast.
We followed them a couple minutes later to claim our seats. We meet the server and here’s comes the drunk “cutey” over our shoulders stammering,
“I’m not with them. My party is already here. Haha!”
I guess she had to use the bathroom and lost her “party.” along the way.
At this point you think she would introduce herself back to her friends but nope – this drunken conversationalist ( I guess I just love those words ) had something far more important to mention.
Did I say mention…Sorry I meant declare very loudly…
Just as we’re sitting down I hear,
“That guy has Jimmy Neutron hair…”
Her friends quickly hushed her up and got on with their breakfast. Which by the way I will mention for 8 mostly drunk people they were pretty cool about it. I’ve seen groups that size destroy places and I remember even playing my part once in a while.
Anyways, it took a little while for her words to sink into my old brain but eventually it hit some gray matter…
She was talking about me. Haha!
Now you may thinking, Pete…what’s your point? So what. This girl sort of made fun of your hair. Big deal.
Well as you may have guessed from the questions I asked in the beginning on how you take criticism. Especially when it’s coming from a woman.
My point hit me when I realized the very first thought that crossed my mind after hearing her may not be what you would have expected…
“She wants me.”
Some of you may see it arrogance and my typical cocky attitude but if you knew me long ago, I would have been utterly destroyed by it. It actually would have made me depressed. Hell I might have even decided to change my hair and I definitely would have become overly self-conscious about it.
My nice guy approach has taught me some valuable lessons along the way and if you’re a guy who get self-conscious because a woman says something or does something to make you believe you’re less than someone she would go for I believe this can show you differently.
The moment those words entered my brain all I saw was a woman who wanted to tease me. Teasing IS a good thing and it also means I get to tease her back.
I consider it an invitation to flirt and bust some balls.
I consider it HER way of letting me know – “OH IT’S ON!”
And if you want it – bring it. Yeah I just said that.
Sure you can take it as a “put down” and let her make you feel bad but why bother making yourself feel below her.
Only the cruelest women who have absolutely no regard for someone else’s feeling would put you down just for the sake of “putting you down.” and I can tell you that “girl” is so rare don’t worry about her.
When a woman makes an effort to point out something about you she finds funny… consider it’s a test. It’s HER way of letting you know she NOTICED you. It’s her invitation to play a little with her.
If you can handle her little test without being an ass and actually use it to your advantage you’re bound to see a difference in how woman see you.
If you can use anything outside yourself to build your confidence (or your cockiness in this case haha! ) where too many guys fail you’ll be the one guy who stands out among the rest.
Laarn to look for those little “cues” and “clues” about when a woman might be testing, I suppose drunk or not because missing them, failing them, or failing to act appropriately and more attractive is something we ALL must strive for.
So… To the drunken cutey who loved my Jimmy Neutron hair that night…I’m glad I wasn’t wearing a silver shirt, you probably would have bought my breakfast hoping you can “get a little.”
And think about this…
Waking up hungover next to a cartoon with a huge smile on your face. Now that’s a story worth telling 🙂