You can sit and think about it forever but nothing seems to pop up and when it does, reads like shit. You keep changing it over and over again but nothing seems to fit what you want to say.
The daunting task of just a few simple creative words stops you in your tracks dead and you're STUCK! Can not move on until it's done.
Luckily today, in this lesson in dating online you're going to learn, no matter how well you write or not, how to come up with some clever and enticing headlines that women will want to respond to after you send your message.
Remember in part one the idea was to forget about women writing to you. This applies here. You're the leader. You always make the first move and she'll be impressed. You have little control over a woman contacting you first so don't go there just yet at least.
Here's what will covered today:
- What your headline must contain which will get you noticed and encourage a woman to write you back.
- What mistakes to avoid so women will far less likely to pass you by.
- How to come up with some clever headlines which say a lot about you but still leave some room for mystery.
- An exercise you can use to build a quick really cool headline.
- Plus, a little about writing out your entire profile which will be covered entirely later.
How to write a great headline so women will want to read your profile.
First, you must be reminded about the difference between talking TO and talking WITH women that was covered in the first part.
Talking with women is just your basic conversation skills. Making friends, talking to associates, etc..
Talking TO women is speaking directly to her female nature, her desires, her passions, and things which emotionally charge her up. Flirting, teasing, and confident sexual communication is the base for it.
You want to create and trigger her attraction.
Your headline must talk TO women and not with them.
Try to imagine what women desire as in mystery and excitement. Women are often curious enough to try to read between your lines and that's what you want to happen.
Stay away from being too blatant. Try not to give her a direct answer. Let her mind wander and wonder too. Sprinkle in the details about you will come later. Mix a confident cocky style.
Here's where I give you the tools to continue or further working on your "talking skills" with women. The link is on the previous post and will help you with your message writing skills.
Next... or first up.
Your headline must be consistent and congruent with your profile.
You will get her interested and she will check out your profile, either look at your picture, and read your headline.
Keep that in mind because the rest of your profile must match up entirely. Don't leave her confused because she will leave quickly and never look at you again.
Also remember that your intention is to take the lead and write her first. Don't rely on searches.
If she's impressed, which she will be after you've done your work she will then examine your profile much deeper depending on who she is, what she's looking for, and hesitant she is about getting a date online.
KEY POINT: Your "job" so-to-speak, is to make her feel comfortable writing you back. You'll miss a lot of great women if you don't because they tend to be shy and might not know what to write to a real guy she's not used to meeting who gets it.
The consistency you're creating here will go a long way to making her feel comfortable.
If you're all over the place and confusing, it will make her feel even more confused and even more nervous about writing you back.
Always know who you intend to date before you write your profile and try putting it your headline.
Headlines are normally too short for this but they can make a difference for some, if that's the direction you want to take.
Doing so however might make it easier to push out a consistent profile.
Stay away from standard pasted non-personal junk though like, "Looking for You" and "Are You The One For Me?".
If you're going to do it, get it right and be very specific about the woman or type of woman you're looking to meet and date.
You are in CHARGE of who you seek to date. Never forget that!
Your headline must entice her to want to know and read more about you.
You can leave a simple question if you want but I personally had no luck with it so I'm not going to suggest it. That's for you to experiment with if you'd like to give it a try.
Do not quote something that is not original. No clichés or catch phrases.
Take a look at some women's headlines and notice the ones where she did it. Read her profile and you'll see exactly why you should not do it ever.
The biggest problem with writing quotes, clichés or catch phrases is that for one, it's very unoriginal, unimaginative, and it only says you put absolutely no effort into writing it.
This will always project to any woman reading it that most likely, that's how the first meeting or date is going to go.
Boring - bland - unimaginative - typical - no attraction at all.
Think mystery, excitement, something which begs to be open because she just help help to know what's coming next.
Imagine your profile is like going out on a date and I do believe most people get dressed up a little before they go out on a date.
Your ENTIRE profile becomes similar to what you wear or how you dress.
YOUR LIFESTYLE is like your shoes. They represent HOW you life your life.
YOUR PHOTOS are like your pants and your shirt. They're going to make a great first impression and are congruent to who you are. They also are consistent to what you write in it and what you message her.
You wouldn't go on a date without brushing your teeth, washing up, cutting your nails, and trimming your facial hair, right?
This is no different from what your profile must represent or show to women.
In other words NO run on sentences, facts thrown in strange places or an absolutely complete mess to follow. Keep it short and always strive for an experience over a fact giving seminar which will bore the shit out of her.
With that said...
Your HEADLINE can then become an accessory you would normally wear on a date like a necklace, a belt, wrist band, etc...
These are normally items which catch people's eyes first and they usually have a story attached to them.
They're also good conversation starters and can be used to "flesh" out your entire profile, remaining consistent and appears clever too.
Time for a quick recap before we get lost.
What your headline must say:
- Entice her to read more - Mystery.
- Represent your lifestyle.
- Be original and unique to you.
- No clichés or quotes from others.
- Accessorize your entire profile - Consistent.
- Short and to the point.
- You can use a question but it's not encouraged.
- Challenge her to write back to you quickly... or else she could miss out on a great rare guy like you.
The Formula or Steps on HOW to come up with a Great Headline
Your headline will lead to your profile so write it first and build your profile around it.
Experiment a little. This could take some practice but it's worth it.
Here is an exercise to help you out.
1. Write down a few things that pop in your head about who are.
You will NOT use these but you will work off of them.
Here are some examples:
- Nature Loving.
- Hate Peas.
- Often Misunderstood.
2. Next, you'll want to take those statements about yourself and build something which will fulfill the guidelines above.
- Nature Loving becomes - "I Argued With A Squirrel Once - He Was Nuts!"
- Hate Peas becomes - "Never Look Underneath My Mashed Potatoes."
- Often Misunderstood becomes - "I Never Use Blinkers When I Drive."
That's all there really is to it.
Writing a great headline should not take you long at all and if you use my exercise above you will also have some clever ideas when you send out your first message.
Here's a great tip.
Keep all your ideas in a text file and rework them from time to time. Use them as a subject line when you message women and change them often if it's possible.
You can go through them occasionally to rework them or add new ones. After a few weeks you'll have lots of ideas and stories to go along with them.
All that from a simple exercise on writing your headline.
Here it is again:
- Write down some statements about yourself.
- Take those statements and build a clever headline from it.
Doing it will also become very useful in ALL areas of online dating. Even setting up the first date and what to talk about while you're on it.
Not only is writing a great headline an easy way to get her to want to know more about you, but by using my exercise above you'll also be practicing your writing skills and developing a style that is unique.
You will get the creative juices flowing which will help you write out quick and easy profiles to grab a woman's attention and make her want to message you back quickly before some other woman snatches you up.
That's key here.
When she believes other women will get to your first she'll act quickly and get some kind of message back to yo.
Here's an example you can build from based on everything that was covered so far.
Follow it along you'll see exactly how and why it can work for you too. Just don't use it, okay? It's rather stupid but I'm not here to do your work. Everything must obviously come personally from you.
This would be from a short story example of a profile which is just one type. There are many types you can choose from to build your own.
Headline Writing Example and Story Profile
HEADLINE: "You're Ugly and You Smell Funny!"
PROFILE: I was experimenting one day in the kitchen. I do that from time to time when I have lots of ingredients lying around and I want to try something different.
It started out with a can of tomatoes and some freshly crushed garlic which happen to be two of my favorite things to eat. A little water. A medium pot. Some simmering heat. Noticed some fresh Parmesan in my fridge and decided to give it a lovely pungent flavor.
Then on to the black pepper. A spice I could NOT live without. I completely understand how explorers would travel thousands of miles for a new spice route. Would have been there right with them.
Then some red pepper flakes because for some bite. Who doesn't love food with some spice and heat.
Things were going great... That is until I found a few stalks of celery, some carrots, and an onions in the fridge. Chopped it all up and sautéed it in some extra virgin olive oil and some sausage dripping from a few night s ago. Mmmm. A few more spices from a secret recipe not many people are lucky enough to see.
Once the celery was clear and slightly brown I dumped it in my simmering tomatoes but it was much too drippy for my taste.
MORE PARMESAN PLEASE....
The next thing I know I was staring at a pot of sauce so thick I could barely stir it. And the smell. Pungent cheese, garlic, burnt celery and onions in a pan with left over sausage chunks.
Now I was thinking... What the HELL am I going to put in it?
Mmmmm anchovies. Haha! Little salty fish. But just a few. Those things will take over any dish.
All I had was some Rotinis from an Antipasto salad I made a few weeks ago, but I said what the hell, I boiled them up and drained out the water. They were the colored kind too, Haha! Not a very pretty looking pasta for tomato sauce but I dumped them on the plate anyways. I rinsed out the pan and went to fill my wine glass.
And let me tell you what I saw when I came back, was, without a doubt, the ugliest dish I had ever seen or made.
And the smell. Wow. Fish. Cheese. Garlic...
But you know what?
The taste was incredible. Well worth the experiment and will definitely make it again. It was some of my finest dining and gave it a very special name. Something I would never forget...
"You're Ugly and You Smell Funny"
You should try it some time. I think you'll enjoy it.
Keep in mind that was just an example, as elaborate as it was.
It's way too long and and it doesn't ask a woman to write BUT it does show passion, creativity, indifference, and avoids many of the most common mistakes many guys makes.
Again, this is the short story type. There are generally many types of full profiles you can choose from later on.
The conclusion so you begin to creating your very own headline and profile.
Headline writing is one of the easiest parts of online dating if you do it correctly. However do it wrong and it will get you overlooked when it doesn't have to be that way.
Take the formula above and work it until it works for you. Give it some time and if nothing comes into your mind, do something else to distract you and something might pop up.
In the very least it will get your mind off of the problem for a while so when you try again you'll be fresher and more creative.
Do NOT spend too long trying to figure the perfect one out but understand it's often seen more than your actual profile. So get it right and don't let a bad headline send a potential date away.
Remember to keep your ideas in a text file and work them and re-work them because as you change your profile or come up with something new you'll be creating a ton of great ideas you can use.
This is a process which takes a little time but is worth it if you're willing to do the extra work. The dates will come and pay off. The rewards be there as they were for me.
A tweak there. A little more research. Moving things around and EXPERIMENTING was a sure key to my success. I suggest you do the same.
Have fun with it!
A lot of what you read in this series is based on my personal successful run online which, as told before, led to me meeting and marrying my amazing wife.
⊕ Triggering Her Attraction ⊕
As noted in the previous post, before I started I bought a book on attraction, two of them actually: Attraction Isn't A Choice and Double Your Dating by David DeAngelo and threw myself into practicing the techniques and building my skills outside the internet. Then a friend tossed me Meeting Women Online.
Always opt for spending a little extra on advice that works rather than just paying for an online subscription service that's not doing you any good anyways.
If you'd like to share your experiences (good and bad) and any ideas you've come up for you headline, make sure you leave it below.
Meeting Women Online
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Part 2: The Frustration to Online Dating Ends Now!
Dating online can be a frustrating experience and drive you crazy. With so much to do & write and search for, it can be a daunting task.
You might decide to avoid doing altogether. That's going to change starting today. This positive course will show you how's it done and what to do to succeed through internet dating.
Part 3: Building the Perfect Online Profile
Writing a great profile is hard enough let alone getting women to see it, read it entirely, and message you back.
Not a problem anymore.
These tips and what big mistakes to avoid will show how to do it and impress lots of women. With the rest of the series it will practically write itself and women will contact you quickly.
Part 4: How to Send Messages to Women's Online Profiles
Hey man, before you go sending any message to a woman's online profile, you're going to need these tips and tricks I've compiled over years of research & testing.
Contacting a woman & getting her to get back to you, the easy way.
What not to say, what to say, & how you can succeed to get more date on the internet.
Man writing online profile by olia danilevich.
Woman smiling at your headline by Andrea Piacquadio.