If a girl rejects you – based on the circumstances – there might be still be chance. She sounds young. Things could change for her over time. She could be unsure, inexperienced, and put in a moment when she could react badly to your specific approach. All generally speaking of course.
If a woman rejects you – and you’re around her age – circumstances aside – the chance of her changing her mind within a reasonable time goes down to practically zero. Which means it’s probably not going to happen with her… ever.
Now that we’ve separated the “girl” from the “woman” let’s talk about this whole “rejection” thing. I’ll bring up a few arguments for the guys who think being persistence is a good thing. How long you can try to change her mind. And of course the circumstances where rejection comes after the “friends first” condition and more.
Rejection can a tough thing to handle. When a girl rejects you it can hurt for a long time. Being “denied” might even feel like you’ve had your heart ripped out of your chest.
“…But to the woman, the only thing she is hiding is the fact that she isn’t feeling attracted and does not want to reject a good friend.” Do Women Hide It When They Are Attracted to You?
You might think the worst type of rejection I “suffered” came from some apparent heartless women who outright refused me through some superficial statements like “I don’t date shorter guys!!!” OR “Ewww. No thanks!!” (both of which I’ve heard) but those really didn’t hurt for very long at all.
Sure they might’ve left a lasting impression and caused me some doubt in the future but the quick sting at least showed me the type of women who were rejecting me and I would like to personally thank them for it. 🙂 In a way they saved me a ton of future pain or drama.
Maybe you’re with me on or not on this but I’d take the “quick rejection” any day over the “long-term” denial we tend to put ourselves through on our quest for a relationship with a real, kind, decent woman – who just happens to be incredibly attractive and sexy.
You see way too many of my rejections were long drawn out “friendships” where I thought I had a chance. At least my mind talked me into it when in reality, I was fooling myself.
Eventually when my “true” feelings came out the rejection felt like I was being hit by a bus and landed squarely in the hospital. The accident causing months of pain where others would come and visit and feel sorry for me as I rehabilitated myself.
The even worse part of being rejected in situations where I only delayed the inevitable was that for a while after – I actually thought I STILL had a chance.
But we know or knew the truth…
A pure friendship with no attraction at all has little to ZERO chance of ever becoming anything more and to actually believe we could someday change her mind is borderline insanity.
In those cases where you’re long drawn out friendship and you’re “in love” with her you have a few choices to make:
- Remove yourself entirely and get out of the friendship immediately. Don’t delay the rejection.
- Limit your friendship with her and learn to eliminate the friends zone. A good start would be to go through my Ebook – Eliminate The Friends Zone. Do it now because it won’t be free for very long!
- Learn about the Honey Badger. An old but important video about attraction and being friends and how to pick up Friends Into Lovers.
Persistence doesn’t work that way.
It’s understandable and a somewhat fact that being persistent can be an attractive trait but the problem with persistence is knowing when it becomes insane or an unrealistic “hope” and the other fact that women decide quickly whether a guy is date-able or not.
We have to consider so much more about continuing to try despite her rejection and not much of it can we even be fairly certain about. Like if she is attracted to us. Her exact reasons for turning us down. Her state of mind when we approached or asked. Her current emotional state of having to deal with guys “like us”. And the list goes on.
A more reasonable approach to being rejected is to first consider “other” things we can change. Like how it might mean we need to change our technique. Our communication. The way we think or don’t think. At least these things are under our complete control.
Seems to me “persistence” with regards to attracting women is more of a “trait” to have about life and overcoming challenges and less about “not giving up” when a woman rejects us. Yeah, it could and has happened for some guys but the odds are highly unlikely and therefore not a recommended technique.
“…always remember this about being rejected. There’s a difference between feeling hurt, and feeling sorry for yourself.” 7. Being Rejected
When we consider “rejection”, why it happens, and then our stubbornness in believing there’s still a chance appears to be more of a deflection or a reliance on hope as we let our attachment to someone grow beyond reasonable thought. Again, too many questions must be answered that may not help us to grow as people and could stop us from moving on in a more productive way.
I’ve been rejected many times in my life where I refused to give up and I must honestly admit – the better choice was to walk away and to consider “something else” or someone else. The times I made myself believe there was still a chance only delayed the inevitable and that lost time could’ve been spent in a much more productive way.
Asking the question, “If a girl rejects you is there still a chance?” doesn’t seem to be the right question to ask on a man’s journey to not only become a more attractive man but to actually succeed in finding the right woman AND attracting her too.
The quick answer will always tend to be a resounding “NO. There isn’t a chance.”
Why bother wasting valuable time “trying” to make something happen which naturally happens by itself.
Attraction is not meant to be forced and you can never coerce someone into feeling no matter how much effort you put into it.
“While most men would sleep with most of their female friends if the woman came on to them, most women would NOT sleep with most men that they consider just friends.” What Women HATE Most About Single Guys
Romancing a woman for months or years hoping she’ll cave in (based on persistence alone) from my experience rarely if ever leads to something better than a strong natural attraction felt from the very beginning on of the first few interactions.
Yes, I’m assuming the “rejection” is that of which no attraction was felt but when it happens any other way I wouldn’t consider it being rejected anyways. It becomes something else under other circumstances and I’m hoping in those situations we can find a more appropriate name for it.
When a girl seriously “rejects” you, whether it’s the hard or easy way, whether she’s rude or nice about it, whether she gives you a pack of lies to spare your feelings, whether she unknowingly gives you a real reason to not like her anyways – it’s time to move on to bigger and better things.
Hanging about hoping, thinking you can change her mind never turns out good. Actually sometimes it becomes more of what a stalker would do only pushing you closer to making the pain last longer than it ever needs to last. Hurting worse in the end because of the lasting affect it can have on your confidence and self-esteem.
It’s best to let it go.
Don’t take it personal.
Learn something from it.
Learn to ask more important relevant questions which can help you in the long run of life, relationships, happiness, and becoming a more attractive real man.
Move on as quickly as you can. If it’s taking too long work on your confidence and self-esteem immediately.
The right woman will rarely if ever reject you instantly IF you get things even close to right from the very beginning and the opposite is also true.
If you’re rejected instantly or put it on yourself while mucking about in a friendship with her, the chance of anything ever happening is close to if not ZERO.