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Men and Women Choose! The Nice Guy or The Jerk?

in Bad Boys, Inspiration
Nice guy or the Jerk?

True story… I know a woman.

She wants a nice guy and of course an amazing long-lasting and fulfilling relationship.

I know, the nerve of her, right? 🙂

But… and here’s surprise:

She is attracted to jerks.

For my own personal reasons let’s call her Olivia.

Olivia is attractive but guys also want her for several other reasons.

She’s cool, has a great sense of humor, outgoing, and absolutely loves to flirt.

She’s a short girl with an awesome ass and a perky set of boobs.

In other words – she has ALL the qualities men look for and more too.

Okay, let’s not build up Olivia’s ego too much. She might read this and I will probably have to explain to her why I haven’t slept with her yet.

Anyways, she loves what I do and totally gets off on my dissection of the social circumstances we find ourselves in and tells me everything, yes everything.

Except, despite all her great qualities, Olivia is a classic example why a woman finds herself with jerks and she’s tired of the bullshit.

She wants a real relationship with a real nice guy but just can’t help herself from falling for the losers over and over again.

I don’t want get into the whole story but recently she asked me about a certain guy.

He showed up in a public place she works. Didn’t say more than a few words. Stayed for a while with his eyes glued on his phone and checked her out once in a while and then left.

But on the way out he touched her lightly on the back and said,

“Hey… Later!”

Of course she looked at me and was curious as to what I was thinking.

I laughed devilishly and so she hits me with,

“Oh God. I know what you’re thinking.”

To which I replied,

“Actually you don’t. The only thing I was thinking when he left was how he touched you on the back and on the back of the arm while he was leaving. You see, guys, sexually intuitive guys at least, won’t touch a woman that way unless he wants to fuck her.”

The evening went by and we discussed a little about him and how he ended up there. It was sketchy and we both knew it.

She says with a sly but disappointed smile,

“But you see. That’s the type of guys I end up with.”

I thought for a few seconds and stated,

“You know, Olivia. There are guys out there, nice guys,  who can do that to you, or know how to do it without being a jerk. And it’s a very good bet you are NEVER going to meet him here.”

I’m pretty sure I got a look back from her that was a little sad and confused but totally convinced that I was right.

Let me explain it differently for each of the sexes:


There are men out there, nice guys, that are mysterious, alluring, indifferent, aloof, confident, and tempts the bay boy line inadvertently…

And he knows how to do that without being a jerk.

If you haven’t met him yet then you are probably not looking in the right place, or have the right skills to attract him.


Learn to become a guy who is naturally mysterious, alluring, indifferent, aloof, confident, and tempts the bad boy line inadvertently…

Because good, no great women want to fall for the that man and are constantly sometimes desperately looking for him.

Find a way and learn to become him and you will hold all the power in YOUR dating life and you just might get laid more often. 😉

I know I’m making it sound simple but that’s because, in theory, it is!

Often the simplest most elegant answer bears the most beautifully written solutions.

When we make things complicated we waste energy and find ourselves rationalizing our complaints rather than finding the simple solution.

Take for example a recent problem a co-worker had… True story.

He had to hang a bar which would require it to hold ton of weight.

All the tools he had were old and misshapen. He had a limited inventory of what he could use.

Now how did this man solve the problem?

He didn’t!

He kept claiming to me that there was no way of doing it and he was totally frustrated.

He told me how the boss said to do just do it and so he tried it, but it didn’t work.

So what did he do?

Kept trying it again and again and again…

His response, was

“Fuck it! I’m leaving soon and if this is what they want, I’m just going to keep doing until I leave. Because I keep telling them it won’t work and they just won’t listen.”

I couldn’t take it anymore so after the man left, I fixed it and yes it still stands.

How did I do it?


I wasn’t negative.

I tried something different.

I found the strongest material.

Doubled it up.

Banged it into place with a steel bar because there was no hammer, and finished the job.

The connection being,

  • I wasn’t negative.
  • I tried something different.
  • I didn’t complain that there was no way.
  • I didn’t use the excuse of what someone told me to do that wasn’t working.

So what does this have to do with anything here?


Stop being negative about how you always end up with the jerk.

It obviously does not work. There may come a time in your life where you will have to constantly tell yourself, to choose….

The Nice Guy or The Jerk?

And stick by yourself.

I’m not saying to force yourself into relationships with men who don’t turn you on.

I’m saying to find out WHERE those guys are and meet them there.

In other words….do something different!!!

You have to make it happen and for each of you it might be a different path but only you can discover what’s right for you.

Don’t complain about your actions, change them!

Which means no excuses of getting bad advice, or making the wrong decisions in the past.

Show courage with your choices and know fully, even if they are bad, you will learn from it and never use it as an excuse.

THAT is true bravery and on the side happens to be very attractive.

Never forget – bravery and courage when used properly make you incredibly strong and make bouncing back from failures much easier.


Negativity is highly unattractive.

Only terrible women fall for negative men.

Being positive without diluting yourself of the real circumstance affects every part of your masculinity.

Think about this.

How many physically strong men have you met that were weak men, and how many women flocked to him?

Now how many physically weak guys have you met that were strong but for some reason, women adored them?

Listen, if what you have done up until this point has not worked, why would that change?

Are you going to wait around for the whole female population to change?

Do something different!!!

Even if your “tools are misshaped”,  I believe any good decent man has the blueprint inside of him to get this shit handled.

The human race would not be around otherwise. We would have become extinct long ago.

There is no way our human race could have grown this much if women only mated with the physically strong, the very good-looking, or the typical jerks or asshole.

Therefore men over time, have learned to tap into this powerful masculine man inside them.

They have figured out a way to “get it done”.

I highly doubt these men got it right the first time but it didn’t matter. They learned from it, became stronger, and moved on.

Whether you are the nice guy, the jerk, or a good woman who always appears to make bad choices what you choose to become is entirely up to you.

So which is it, What do you Choose?

About the author: Creator of the nice guy approach, why do guys, why do chics, and DiaLteG TM. Transformed from a nice guy kiss ass who wanted women to like me for “who I was” to an attractive “good guy” who knows what it takes to create attraction and succeed with women, dating, and relationships.

Please visit all my pages: The Nice Guy Approach | The Approach | Why Do Guys…? | Why Do Chics…? OR Like my Facebook fan pages: Why Do Chics…? | DiaLteG TM OR JOIN the best group on women at Why Do Chics…?. Yes, I’m a very busy guy. 🙂 Oh… I almost forgot Twitter – Peter White.

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