A visitor left a note and claimed, “Women find me too predictable and boring.”
I think I know where he was coming from… boring and predictable for us nice guys ARE without a doubt two of the worst attraction killers.
We just can’t lull a woman into our arms and hope by going nowhere with her, that some kind of excitement will just magical appear.
My secret cure to this problem is simply… one word… FASCINATION!!
It’s where one person (or a group of people) become mesmerized by something.
A compelling story, a picture, a look, a fad, and yes even another person.
Now we must understand boring a woman into not feeling attracted definitely means we need to learn an important skill… “The Art Of Conversation” or even a more exciting lifestyle but it’s sort of easy to make a boring life more fascinating through the wonderful art of conversation.
“Some guys spend too much time trying to appear “cool” to a woman- and wind up coming across as stiff and boring. For these guys, they need to learn how to inject some fun and playfulness into their conversations.
Working our way back to fascination and how it makes us seem less boring….
I did a little research and in the middle of it I just happened to download a photograph of a bored women waiting with her luggage…
And it suddenly hit me!
I put myself in her shoes.
I imagined what it was like to be bored.
For a brief second I sat across some faceless body and was predicting everything the he/she would say or do.
Then I went back to her quietly waiting and thought to myself…
“How could she be so bored? I’m rarely ever bored. No matter where I am or what I’m doing – boredom is the LAST thing on my mind.”
But that’s me.
I’m fascinated by anything and everything.
I could literally, and have done, watch an ant crawl across my floor and become interested over it. Hey man it’s okay, you can bust my ass about it.
But imagine that Ant has ( I think ) six legs and how they work together. I mean we know what to do with two right. Four makes a little sense. But really how do you walk with six freaking legs? What does it even feel like?
See what I mean.
Anything and everything fascinates me.
For those of you who believe it’s my creativity (as I’ve been told) I don’t think it is.
You do NOT have to be at all creative to be totally vamped up over anything.
All you have to do is:
- Look beyond the obvious and you can do that by exploring one aspect of anything.
- Examine how it’s connected to you or all of us.
- Communicate that effectively to the people around you.
If you can do that in a way which involves a woman’s opinions, her desires, and what fascinates her, the last thing she will see you as boring.
“You want to keep the subject of the conversation on HER as much as possible. The more she can talk about herself, the more attraction she will feel for you.
How to Talk to Women: Dating Conversation Topics.
She might think your life is kind of somewhere in the middle BUT she will put that aside to be with you.
Make sure she’s included and it’s not just you rambling on incoherently. ( Although if you already have a spark with her she just might find that kind of cute. )
Never allow yourself to be bored no matter what you’re doing and communicate that excitement to others.
You can connect with so many women with such ease by doing that but of course it does help to pick the right topics in your conversation with her.
Start noticing the amazing world around you and how you are connected to it.
Be fascinated by everything and allow that “energy” to flow to everyone around you.
Women stand up and take immediate notice to men with real passion. Not over the top bullshit and definitely not 24hrs a day… just enough to show your fascination in things.
And women are rarely bored around a guy who knows how to stimulate her emotions.
Predictable is something different.
First of all, lots of women prefer somewhat “predictable” in a long-term relationship with a guy because it means he’s consistent AND reliable.
I think most men confuse those.
Predictable to her is a guy who is approval seeking, needy, desperate to have her like him, risk- free, afraid of his own opinions…
In other words – she tests you for a response and you give her exactly what she expected.
The best way to think about it is – You’ll be predictable to her IF you act like every other guy she felt nothing for.
Consistent and reliable are not really bad because they show a woman you have YOUR life under control and can also fit her in it.
You’ll also show her you can handle certain problems in that same way.
Making you a long-term option.
I personally believe people are generally followers and they’re looking for someone to lead them.
Women are NO exception and so they will look to men to lead them.
Boring and predictable is when you fall into the norms of life, when you’re not interested in yourself thinking nobody would be interested in you…
Boring is just a lack of excitement.
Predictable is acting like every other guy who didn’t know how to turn her on.
If your conversations are exciting – she’ll become excited to talk to you.