We’re all guilty of wearing some sort of mask.
Whether it’s for our boss, our parents, our neighbor, or just a quick “How you doing?” while we spot someone on the street, it’s all the same.
We put on some face to please or to avoid something and I can see its benefits…
Maybe it’s a time saver. Maybe it’s to avoid hurting someone. Maybe it’s for money, fame, or glory. You know, to please the masses when the spotlight is on us.
When it comes to being a more attractive guy, that very same mask is something we should all try to avoid doing because it can become UNATTRACTIVE.
Have you ever saw a “try hard” before?
MISTAKE #2: Trying To “Convince Her To Like You” Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women.
It’s the guy who is obviously putting on some act to please a girl. For some reason a few women go along with it but it’s mostly because she’s being nice.
She knows who he is.
She also knows he’s only doing it for her or women in general.
Except she ASSUMES he’s probably ONLY doing it just to get in her pants.
Women will rarely test or date this guy not only because of his clear intentions, but also because his “try hard mask” is once again assumed to be hiding something worse.
Probably an ass kissing personality. A clueless often destructive attitude towards women.
Those “try hards” are often seen as needy, desperate, and only show they will take anything they can get.
Let’s say you’re not trying at all or you believe you’re not wearing that kind of mask.
A little aloof.
You set early disqualification barriers but not enough to give her a clear signal of your intentions.
And then something else starts to happen…
She starts to wonder about you.
She might even test you but in a different way.
She’ll do things to get close to you. She’ll take notice as to how you are with other women.
She will even go so far as to tell you how she feels… hoping your reaction will reveal your feelings towards her. Typically it’s a very subtle gesture but it can be also quite blatant.
Under those circumstances most guys crumble.
They begin to act differently because of the signal she gave.
“The only way to control how you act around your greatest attraction is by becoming a person who is attractive first.” – Preferences Aside, Is What You Find Attractive Controlling Your Actions.
In a way – the mask comes off and now they start acting very similar to the “try-hard” guy.
And she sees and feels every bit of it.
Of course some women will go along with for a little while but don’t let that fool you.
She’ll begin to look for all the reasons why she couldn’t possibly date you. If she’s desperate enough or shy she may might stay a little longer until she gets the nerve to break it off but it’s bound to happen eventually.
It’s not all doom and gloom. It’s not set in stone.
But it IS a ticket out of attraction because she now knows the guy behind the mask.
She feels like she gets you completely before it ever got started.
She never questions the judgments she makes about you.
The mystery’s gone and you quickly blend into the background of her love life.
Who knows, maybe the word NEXT crosses her mind.
The first mask is clear. False confidence and trying way too hard.
The second is hidden. The mask of hiding true intentions. It comes off quickly once she’s revealed her hand.
Either way you look at it, they are both unattractive or become unappealing within a very short time.
The answer is easy to decide but admittedly tough to accomplish…
Why don’t we just take off the mask, refuse to wear one, or just don’t wear one in the first place.
I’m not saying let it all on the line for her every time you see her.
I’m saying BE the same guy no matter what she throws at you.
If you begin to act “differently” because of something she’s doing or saying, you’re telling her you were hiding behind a mask waiting to reveal your true self.
If you’re displaying false confidence because you think that what she wants, you must admit sooner or later, THAT world will come crashing down on you.
If you’re trying TOO hard to do something which kind of comes natural anyways, I mean you’re a man, she’s a woman, in that heterosexual world, it is MEANT TO HAPPEN. (Maybe not with everyone but if we maintain more choices we’re going to do alright.)
Remember the guy she first falls for – is the guy she wants and she just might find herself always searching for that guy… unfortunately wearing a mask might send her looking for that guy BUT in somebody else.
This again is simple to declare but harder to achieve.
“…You can ALWAYS find the right answer contained within your rules of being a man which will deem you as more attractive.” How And Why A Set Of Man Rules Can Help You Attract Women.
After all I’m NOT asking you or anyone else to just be yourself. That’s different. It’s obvious if you’re not attracting the women you want, something needs to change within your interactions with them.
What makes this even more difficult to do is the fact that we all tend to develop our unique masks as we grow into maturity or keep our immature mask on for way too long.
An even tougher problem arrives when we have several masks for each situation we find ourselves in. As in or boss, neighbor, friends relatives, and so on.
We might question when is it right to wear one, and when is it wrong.
The answer for me became clear at some point and if you want to use it, go for it! I found mine shortly after reading this… 77 Laws of Success With Women and Dating.
Your views, how you act, what you decide, basically HOW you live your life will change over time. Expect it. Embrace it. Learn to evolve with it.
However what I listed above works no matter where you find yourself…
- STOP trying to be the guy you think SHE wants.
- STOP reacting to her “vibe” and start acting from your self only.
- In other words BE a leader as best you can.
- BE decisive.
- MAKE clear choices.
- FOLLOW THROUGH with your plans.
And hell if you only really want to get in her pants, then just maybe, at this point, it’s okay if she knows that reality and not some game you think just might trick her into allowing it to happen.