Have you ever noticed how when you want something it’s easy to learn how to get it? It may not be easy to make it a reality but figuring out what to do is the easy part.
We’re taught by others,
“If you want something, go for it. Stay vigilant. Don’t let failures stop you. Chase down your dreams and catch them.”
Which is great advice until you realize it doesn’t work with “getting” women.
Think about all the women you tried to be with. I mean the ones who really did it for you. The ones who instantly gave you that, “I have to have her now!” feeling inside your gut…
But nothing ever happened no matter how hard you tried.
How at first you had hope and were quickly reminded what you’re taught, “If you want something – chase it down and take it.”
So you think with women it must be the same. ..
Maybe if I do this – she’ll like me back. I’ll romance her. Women like that. I’ll show her what a great guy I am! I’ll BE better than all those OTHER guys.
I’ll give her whatever she wants so she understands what a great provider I’d be.
I’ll be there for her to prove my commitment to loving her and how I’m not just looking for sex. How she’s much more than a body to me.
“I used to believe hooking up with women was primarily about being in the right place at the right time and I always seemed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. How To Start Making Your Own Luck With Women
But unfortunately and with great despair you realize it doesn’t work and you’re left looking for another one who makes you feel “that” way.
Could everyone and their advice just be plain wrong?
Maybe only the “lucky” get what they want out of life.
How if you’re not in the right place at the right time, you’re stuck settling for whatever life and women (in particular) is willing to give you.
Despite all your efforts, your dreams, your hopes, and your uncontrollable attraction – she’s always just out of reach.
It’s enough to frustrate the hell out of you and leave you pissed off and confused because you think you did everything right.
It worked with school.
It worked with that job you always wanted.
It even worked when you wanted a bigger television or a better car.
Yet every time you tried to chase down the “women of your dreams” it felt life if you did absolutely nothing, or the complete opposite, it wouldn’t have changed anything.
“I quickly learned “chasing” women who wanted little to do with me sexually was actually causing me to feel more lonely than ever.
Chasing Women, Being Lonely – How To Stop and Allow Attraction to Work
You wonder why you even bother trying.
The way I see it is that us guys have a sort-of built-in switch inside us.
When you meet a woman and you become highly attracted to her it’s turned on.
Suddenly she becomes the object of your desires and of course you feel drawn to her and that pain in the ass The “go-get-her” switch now has you doing things you would normally do to achieve any other goal.
But what is beyond (its) comprehension is when your goal is an actual person it’s in their best interest to fight back.
The old “fight or flee” response I hear so many “attraction” gurus talk about suddenly has her not literally in all cases, but on average running from you.
It’s because no sane person wants to be controlled.
No one wants to be chased.
No one wants to be owned.
It goes against a deeper instinct of survival.
No matter what the details are something inside us all tells us when our hands our tied and we’re not allowed to control our fate, we feel more helpless than if we are given the opportunity to make it on our own.
Think about this… the excitement of a little healthy bondage is not about being unable to move. The real excitement comes from trying to set ourselves free.
“We must never make “getting her” more important than freeing ourselves from being controlled by the “attraction” switch inside us. Is Friends First Making You Feel Powerless and Played By Her Game?
It’s about gaining the control back. It’s not about the actual goal of freedom but the joy of fighting for it.
I don’t know about you but the women who enjoyed me tying them up – liked it just lose enough to struggle.
What all this means, or how clear the solution becomes, is that if you make certain goals in your life more important ( then women ) you’re more likely to experience all that this world and the women you desire the most has to offer.
We must never make “getting her” more important than freeing ourselves from being controlled by the “attraction” switch inside us.
Now I talk a lot about forgetting all the rules and how once in a while just do what you want but there’s an entirely different purpose for that.
Today’s purpose is to stop you (and me too) from allowing that “switch” to turn women into a goal. I know I’ve done it before. Hell I’ve allowed that switch to make me do some pretty stupid just to get one girl.
I’ve found the direct path to any woman’s heart, passion, or sexual encounter will only get you lost 99 out of a 100 times.
I’m not ranting today and I’m not trying to beat the same old information in all of our heads… in case you’ve heard all this before.
My personal spin is when she flips your switch, makes you a little hard, has you staring and imagining what if or how; when your impulses has you turning her into a goal…
I want you to take a step back with me.
Admit anything and everything she “makes” you feel like doing with her and then laugh it off.
Think about her switch and what it does to her and what it would have her doing for you… and then laugh it off.
Is it a solution?
Will this little exercise solve our “switch” problems?
Probably not – but it will help us gain a little more control because our goals will change into getting something besides her.
It’s a simple goal and easy to achieve:
- Step back.
- Admit that the switch just got turned on.
- Imagine what “her” switch will have her doing for you.
- And then laugh it all off.
The way I see it is the worst thing that could happen is we enjoy a good laugh and a woman sees us smiling.